Why Is My Ex Ignoring Me?


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You’ve been trying to apologize or make up with your ex but all your texts and calls go unanswered. You’re frustrated and hurt, understandably so. You just want some answers so you can figure out how to make things right. This leads you to the following questions, why is my ex ignoring me? 

These are some of the most notorious and common reasons why your ex is ignoring you based on the research and interviews I conducted as well as my own personal experience. 

  1. Your ex is doing no contact. 
  2. Your ex is still hurt.
  3. Your ex hates you.
  4. Your ex has met someone else.
  5. Your ex has nothing to say to you.
  6. Your ex is trying to punish you.

Understanding why your ex is ignoring you will definitely give you an idea of what steps you need to take next. 

So, let’s discuss each of these reasons in more detail so you can understand exactly why your ex is ignoring you. 

1. Your ex is doing no contact

After a breakup, it’s not uncommon for someone to cut all contact with their ex. It’s not about punishing you or being hurt.

As I’ve written about on this blog, no contact is an extremely effective way of moving on or re-attracting someone.

The problem is that if your ex was hoping to re-attract you, they wouldn’t be ignoring you. If anything, after reaching out, they would remain cool but lead the conversation towards a date.

Given that your ex is ignoring you and has been doing no contact for a while, it might be safe to assume that your ex is trying to move on and has no intention of replying.

In this case, ignoring you is just a side effect of their main objective which is to move on from you altogether.

Related post: Why did she stop texting me? 

2. Your ex is still hurt

Breakups are painful in general. Even the most amicable split can cause a lot of pain for people. The more dramatic the breakup, the more hurt people tend to feel.

Thing is, everyone recovers at their own pace. 

The one who is hurting more is very prone to taking drastic measures such as ignoring their ex indefinitely.

You could try apologizing or reaching out but they won’t respond for as long as they feel this hurt.

Furthermore, trying to heal from this hurtful experience itself may call for ignoring an ex.

It may not be to get revenge or because they don’t want to talk to you.

Your ex may feel like they have no choice but to ignore you right now until their feelings of pain and sorrow start to heal and subside. 

Related post: How to get back at your ex for hurting you

3. Your ex hates you

Hate is an incredibly strong emotion and is known for influencing people to take drastic actions against others. 

If your ex hates you, then the next natural conclusion is that they won’t want anything to do with you. 

That includes ignoring all of your attempts at communication.

When hate grows too strong, reconciliation or forgiveness become a rarity.

If your ex is someone who struggles to forgive people or you wronged him or her too much, chances are such that they will never speak to you again.

The only thing you can do in this case is move on and provide them with a clean break that they desire at this point. 

Leaving them alone is the right thing to do, especially if you have tried to make amends only to be ignored. 

4. Your ex has met someone else

Up until this point, most of the reasons why your ex is ignoring you have been tied to a desire of moving on.

However, it could also be due to the fact that your ex has already moved on.

In other words, they’ve met someone else or have absolutely no feelings left for you. They’ve put the past to bed and accepted the end of it.

Now, they’re completely focused on the future and being with someone else.

In such a case, it wouldn’t surprise me if your ex is ignoring you.

They don’t have the time or see the need to reply. They also don’t want to give you the wrong idea or risk leading you on by giving you any hope whatsoever.

And so, they just ignore you because they met someone else. 

5. Your ex has nothing to say to you

Sometimes, there’s just absolutely nothing left to be said to an ex. They may not hate you, love you or have any unresolved issues or feelings with you.

Apologies won’t change anything and being in communication would make no difference.

Understandably, it’s rude but at the same time, you can’t force someone to communicate with you, even if they were an ex.

If they have nothing to say to you, then there’s really nothing that can be done. 

6. Your ex is trying to punish you 

There have been some cases when an ex knows how much you want and need to talk to them but they will choose to ignore you for the sake of punishing you.

It’s a bit immature, especially when communication is essential like in the case of managing children and co-parenting or handling business.

They’re icing you out as a means of making life hard for you and that’s pretty annoying. 

Not a lot of people would do that but I would be remiss not to include it as a possible explanation for why your ex is ignoring you.

Related post: Does silence make a man miss you

Should you keep texting your ex?

Honestly, no, you shouldn’t keep texting your ex if they’re ignoring you.

On one hand, I encourage people to make an effort to fix things and work through a bad situation.

Perhaps, you made a big mistake and everything is still fresh.

Your ex may be ignoring you because they’re in shock and need time to process their feelings.

Making an effort to apologize, check up on them and make things right is important and can save a relationship or facilitate reconciliation.

However, other cases call for a seize of communication.

If you keep pestering your ex and they continue to ignore you, it can turn a bad situation into an ugly one.

Don’t put yourself or your ex through that unnecessary drama.

If they want to move on with their life and find some peace, respect their decision and leave them alone.

Also, if their reaction is unfounded or extreme given the circumstances of the situation, the last thing you want to do is keep texting them.

It achieves nothing. 

You’re rewarding someone with your effort and time for treating you like a second-grade citizen. That’s not a self-loving or self-respecting thing to do.

Instead, leave things be and give them the space to contact you if they so wish.

If they don’t, walk away and focus on your present and future rather than what you cannot control.

Related post: What to do when someone ignores your text

In conclusion

Being ignored by an ex can be quite an annoying and frustrating situation to be in. It can even turn out to be quite hurtful. I would strongly advise you to leave them alone because they clearly do not want to communicate.

The most common reason why your ex is ignoring you is that they are doing no contact, they are still hurt, they hate you, they met someone else, they have nothing to say to you or trying to punish you.

Either way, from the looks of it, there’s really nothing you can do other than give them space and move on with your life.

If and when they are ready to talk, I’m more than certain that they will reach out or respond to your messages and calls.

Until then, leave them alone and give them the space they need and want. 

With that being said, I hope you found this article on “why is my ex ignoring me” to be insightful and informative. Please feel free to leave your thoughts or questions in the comment section below and I’ll reply as soon as possible.

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