Why Do Guys Like You When You Stop Liking Them? (Answered)

I was having a conversation with a colleague recently and she wanted to know why do guys like you when you stop liking them. She found it incredibly frustrating and confusing. One would think that acts of service, attention, and love would garner appreciation and desire but that wasn’t her experience. It’s when she walked away or stopped liking someone that they suddenly liked her.

Through careful observation and the study of human behavior, it has become apparent to me that most men value those who they cannot have. Scarcity breeds value and scarcity signals a challenge. Instinctually, guys find validation through the pursuit or hunt for that which eludes their desire. It sounds so primal but ultimately, it is these primal desires that tend to influence our emotional drive.

Also, men need some time and space to miss someone. When they have an opportunity to experience life with you and without you, they can gauge how impactful and important your presence is.

Learning how to pursue a man without chasing him away is a skill that comes from understanding the importance of behaving in a respectful manner towards yourself.

People with self-respect are often perceived as highly valuable.

Walking away from someone who doesn’t appreciate you is a sign of self-respect and value.

For this reason, guys will like you when you stop liking them because it signals scarcity, challenge, and value.

Of particular importance is value.

Let’s talk about that first before we move onto some other things you need to know.

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Reasons Why Guys Like You When You Don’t Like Them Anymore

1. Walking away projects self respect and value

If we think about it, value determines the level fo respect one can generate from others; socially, romantically, and professionally.

When a man percieves a woman’s time, presence, and affection as valuable, it usually implies that he respects her and what she offers. A prerequisite for love is respect. Neither a man nor a woman is capable of romantically loving someone they don’t respect. in a lot of cases, guys don’t place a lot of calue on a woman’s affection, time, and affection if it comes too easily.

If that woman were to remove herself from the picture because the guy shows a lack of value and appreciation for her, she would be communicating her own self respect through her actions. It’s powerful to watch someone choose better for themselves.

Wouldn’t you agree that it’s incredibly difficult to walk away from someone you care about? The fact that you were willing to do that, despite your desire for this man, proves that you have self respect and self worth!

People will only respect or value you if it is evident that you have respect and value for yourself.

Guys start to like you when you stop liking them for this precise reason.

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2. They feel rejected

I think most people are under the illusion that when someone likes them, they will always like them to some degree. We struggle to fathom the idea that a person could stop liking us and choose to find someone else.

When it does happen, it triggers feelings of rejection and inadequacy.

Suddenly, when men experience this, their ego takes a blow. We know that guys are driven by their ego. It has a ferocious appetite for praise and validation. It struggles to surrender when triggered by rejection.

He may begin to ruminate about why you left or why you no longer like him.

People tend to reflect on the past more favourably than not, especially when it comes to romantic partner’s. If you were a force of kindness, love, and validation, I’m sure that he will be nostalgic about your presence in his life.

This surge of investment in thought creates room for desire to develop.

In my experience, this is another pivotal reason why guys like you when you stop liking them.

Winning you back becomes a challenge for validation to some extent.

It’s not the greatest thing in the world but it clearly illustrates that his perception of you has changed to something more valuable and desirable.

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3. Distance makes the heart grow fonder

Sometimes, people need to lose access to something or someone to truly appreciate what or who they had.

Imagine how wonderful life could be if we just zoned into the present, took note of all the blessings around us, and showed appreciation for what and who we have around us.

People would have more loving relationships if they woke up each morning with the intention of being present and grateful for their partner’s and family.

I’ve said this many times but feelings of love are nurtured in person and in absence. Finding the balance between connection and distance is difficult but once dialed in, everything manifests organically and easily.

Perhaps, you didn’t allow for space during the courship.

It’s possible that you were so expressive in your interest and so present at all times that he never really had the opporunity to miss you, fantasize about you, and seek you out.

Now that you’ve taken a step back since you stopped liking him, he’s developing feelings of desire and attraction for you.

Isn’t it ridiculous how most of us behave more attractively when we are not into someone than when we actually are?

You need to read this article: How to make him miss you like crazy

Beware Of Guys Who Will Use You

This is a situation that upsets me deeply because it is incredibly selfish and unfair.

You will come across some guys who will suddenly make an effort to “court” you once it appears like you have given up or stopped liking them.

They have an ulterior motive which is to lure you back into their orbit for validation and attention. To do this, these guys will dangle a carrot infront of you without actually intending on exploring the possibility of love and commitment with you.

Expect them to love bomb you or to show up with enthuasiasm, charm, and promises.

The only way to decipher between a guy who now likes you and a guy who wants to use you is to observe his behavior.

Don’t be fooled by pretty words and false promises.

Both his actions and words should be aligned for a consistent amount of time.

When you start to indulge his efforts to connect, observe whether he gravitates closer to you or becomes reticent and absent again.

This observation plus trust in your gut instincts will usually lead you towards the right conclusion.

Don’t ignore the message being sent by your gut.

It picks up on things sooner than your conscious mind does.

With that being said, I also want to point out that the best type of love and people for us are those who make us feel at ease with them.

Peace is perhaps the best metric to measure romantic compatibility by.

I know that alot of women base much of their romantic decisions on feelings of passion that they often overlook some of the greates red flags known to mankind.

Don’t just overlook a guy who brings peace and compassion because it is often in these relationships that burning desire is fostered.

Compassionate love has the greatest tendency to develop into passionate love over time as long as there’s physical attraction and chemistry.

Please keep this in mind as you navigate the world of romance.

Final Thoughts

If you were to take anything away from this article, let it be the importance of behaving with self-respect.

Value yourself enough to be selective about who deserves your time, presence, and affection.

When considering whether a man is deserving of you, remove your desire for him and examine how he treats you and what he stands for as an individual.

Usually, with the right person, you’ll be able to list a bunch of attributes that are highly coveted in a partner.

If the only thing you fall on is that he’s very attractive or he excites you, then there’s a strong chance that you need to examine your needs and wants in a partner.

That brings us to the end of this article on why do guys like you when you stop liking them. I hope it shed some light on the way men think and the way you should behave around men. If you’d like my help, feel free to get in contact with me by visiting my services page. If you’d like to get your ex back, check out my new book.