Most women dream about the day they fall pregnant. The idea of sharing this huge life event with the man you love can be intoxicating. But, at the same time, it can be quite devastating when this idea falls apart because he leaves. This begs the question, why do guys leave when you’re pregnant?
The only plausible reasons why guys leave when you’re pregnant is because they lacks morals and ethics, they’re afraid of commitment, they want to escape responsibility, they don’t want to be a dad or they’re narcissistic.
I know that this must be heartbreaking for you because there was this underlying trust and belief that he would stick around and be a father to your baby.
The fact that he left when you’re pregnant can create feelings of abandonment for you and your baby.
With that being said, let’s examine each of these reasons of why do guys leave when you’re pregnant so that you can have a better understanding of the type of man he is as well as get some closure for you to move on and focus on your baby.
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1. They lack morals and ethics
Unfortunately, there are people out there who are so consumed by selfish desires that they are willing to compromise all morals and ethics to get what they want.
Their word means nothing and they’ll spin lies to convince you of their love or commitment without feeling guilt or remorse.
It’s possible that he told you what he assumed you wanted to hear to be with you and now that things have become hyper real, he runs.
I know this must be difficult to read but if he doesn’t want this baby, I would not be surprised if he leaves when you’re pregnant.
A real man who cares about you and wants to be a part of his life would not bail on you in this fashion.
In fact, he’d fight to be with you but this isn’t the case and the sooner you are able to accept this, the better it will be for you and your baby.
You’re actually better off without him because he would only end up making you unhappy and neglecting your baby.
2. They’re afraid of commitment
I’ve come to realize in life that people don’t change or grow up unless they want to.
You can provide as much external motivation for them to do so but unless they really want to, the chances of it happening are slim.
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People who are notoriously afraid of commitment do not overpower these fears when they fall in love.
On the contrary, the more serious and stable a relationship becomes, the more their fears and insecurities are triggered.
Having a baby is something that will bond two people forever and that comes with a great deal of responsibility.
It’s a beautiful event in your life but some people allow the change to overwhelm them, triggering feelings of commitment issues to the point that they do something like leave altogether.
I think commitment issues to you, your relationship and the baby is a reason why guys leave when you’re pregnant.
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3. They want to escape responsibility
Commitment is having the desire and honor to show up but taking responsibility is having the ethics, mental fortitude and desire to make sacrifices in taking care of that which you have a responsibility towards.
Having good intentions is one thing but following through on what you have to do is another.
Having a baby will require many sacrifices.
In a way, it requires you to put yourself second and your baby first.
Any parent knows that this responsibility is welcomed because you love your baby and grow into the role of a provider and nurturer of this little beautiful soul.
A man who is stuck in the mindset of a bachelor or youngster may see these sacrifices as a threat to his independence and ability to live.
In other words, he’s being selfish and wants to do whatever he wants instead of having to mature and work hard to be a parent and partner.
So, this is another reason why guys leave when you’re pregnant.
4. They don’t want to be a dad
It might be hard to comprehend for someone who has always wanted to be a parent but there are some people who just don’t want to be a parent.
They choose not to see themselves in those shoes for whatever reason.
They could be immature, self absorbed, deathly afraid or traumatized from their past.
Whatever it may be, the idea of being a father is something he doesn’t want, even if it’s to your baby.
So, instead of doing what’s morally and ethically right, he’ll just leave and pretend like he doesn’t have a child out there.
Believe it or not, I have a relative who hasn’t seen his mother more than a handful of times since he was a child once his parents split.
His mother just didn’t want to be a mum.
She was never prevented from seeing him or being a part of his life but she took the easy way out and ran off to do whatever she wanted.
This made me realize that some people are not built to be parents because they’re unwilling to grow as human beings.
You may never understand it but that’s because you’re operating from a place of maturity, integrity, good values, love and selflessness.
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5. They’re narcissistic
You may think I’m crazy but there are men out there who are so narcissistic and self absorbed that they would leave when you’re pregnant because they’re threatened by the baby.
Narcissists want to be the center of attention.
They want to feel in control of everything and they resent being placed in a secondary position to anyone.
Obviously, a baby takes precedence over everyone once he or she is born.
A narcissist may not be able to handle this and instead of sticking around, they walk away in search of their next target.
In their mind, they aren’t thinking about what’s right and wrong in terms of societal and family norms.
On the contrary, they’re simply thinking about what’s right and wrong for them based on their narcissistic interpretation of the world and people.
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In conclusion
I know that something like this doesn’t make such sense to you and the fear of having to raise a baby by yourself must be overwhelming but you know what, that baby is going to have the love of a mother who wants him or her completely rather than a deadbeat dad.
It will be hard but you’re going to do it and you’re going to be okay because you’re committed and strong.
The only thing I can offer you is some comfort in knowing that things will turnout just fine for you and your little one.
But, I hope that things work out for both you and your baby. Don’t give up hope on finding a good man either, there are many men out there who would make a great partner and father to your baby.
With that being said, I hope that this article on why do guys leave when you’re pregnant provides you with some closure that may help you to move forward as best as you possibly can. If you have any questions or thoughts on this topic, please feel free to let me know by visiting the comment section below.
Its a sad story and hard to understand sometimes . All a mother can do is focus on her own well being to be the best for her baby . You can’t force the other half to be around and it’s a very simple situation for them to be involved it’s either they care or not . Rather they choose to wait I’ll the baby is born because they have doubts if they a father only time can tell . But, a mother must get he strength to get through this on her own and it doesn’t take anything else but a women and her own strength… any mixed emotion or bad energy is more toxic so one must just let go and just try understand how one can just not have any feelings to a life they created . 2 more weeks and I will get to meet my new loved one and ever so happy . The journey thus so far and trying to figure out what I did wrong to scare him away has been long and everyday my head keeps asking same questions like why he doesn’t like me or what I did wrong … it all hurts pain is real but I all use this pain and turn it to strength….. that’s all I can do . Much love to all those mamas we all those any daddy’s who just can’t wake up .
I feel the same way. It so hard. Good luck