Being single is scary, right? When you’re in a relationship, the last thing you want is to actually be single. You may romanticize the idea but as soon as it becomes somewhat of a reality, the fear of being single breaks you down. Thing is, it’s not always a choice but there are many reasons why being single is good for you.
Some of us are guilty of entering a relationship because we are too afraid to stay single and alone.
Because when you are alone, the only person’s approval, love and validation you can get is from yourself.
But if you hate yourself or don’t have a good relationship with yourself, then instead of approval, love and validation, you have to face insecurities, fears, weakness and scrutiny.
That is what makes being single so scary. For this very same reason, it is imperative that we embrace being single. Because if we can overcome our negative relationship with ourselves, life changes unbelievably.
But, in this article, I want to explore why you should be single and a number of reasons why being single is good for you.
1. Overcome Your Insecurities
Being alone is only scary because most of us want to run from our innermost truths. These insecurities that wrap themselves around us are nothing more than obstacles to overcome.
When I was single, I kept obsessing over things that I felt were less than perfect.
I thought about a hundred different ways to change or fix my insecurities but after much time alone, I realized that insecurities exist to propel us into a higher state of acceptance.
You can try to change your face or alter every perception of who you are but it won’t make a difference if you don’t accept and choose to love yourself with or without your flaws and insecurities.
Why is this important?
Imagine this for a second. You don’t have perfect skin and it’s a huge insecurity. You invest hundreds if not thousands of dollars to fix this insecurity. You feel great for a time and things seem merry.
Years start to pass and then you notice a new blemish or wrinkles. Eventually, you find yourself much older with a face full of wrinkles and crows feet that can never truly go away.
What are you going to do then?
That insecurity you once had will fire up again like an inferno.
In this situation, the true path to happiness comes from accepting who you are.
2. Improve Yourself
Just because you accept who you are doesn’t negate the need to be in a constant state of improvement.
You’re single and have all this time on your hands. Instead of lying in bed torturing yourself over being alone, why don’t you invest that time in self-development?
Hit the gym, start studying, take up a new hobby, learn to cook, so on and so forth.
Make self-growth a priority.
Not only will this improve your life as a whole, but you’ll develop a better relationship with yourself.
If you look good, you feel good and if you feel good, you do good.
It’s a simple motto to live by.
This self-improvement journey will place you in a much better position to attract higher quality people in your life.
Just start with an hour a day. That’s not much. And if you don’t have the time, make the time.
3. Focus On Things You Love And Enjoy
Being in a relationship requires commitment and sacrifice. You have to be invested in your partner to a certain degree. This requires spending time with them and working on the relationship.
Sometimes, the reason couples hit a wall and start developing resentment towards their partner is because they no longer have any time for themselves.
Spending time by yourself to do something you love and enjoy is crucial for overall happiness and contentment.
Now that you’re single, make a list of all the fun things you could do with your free time and actually do it.
I often advocate the idea of taking yourself on a date.
4. Meet New People
Expose yourself to new people on a regular basis because it reminds you that life goes on.
Just because you are no longer in a relationship doesn’t mean you can’t establish a new connection with people.
There are many wholesome friendships awaiting you in the world as well as potential romantic relationships.
You have to put yourself out there again because you feel ready to have a good time again.
Don’t force it.
What I’ve learned from meeting new people without expectations is that it helped me figure out exactly what I like or dislike in a person.
I got to experience the different reactions I got from different people based on things I said or did.
I was able to understand them and myself better during this process.
5. Get Over An Ex That Still Haunts You
Moving forward in life with a clean slate is difficult when you are still latching onto the ghost of your ex.
When a relationship ends and you know within your heart that there’s no reality where the two of your reconcile, the only choice you have is to move on.
Easier said than done.
I’ve written an entire article that explicitly sets out a system for getting over someone once and for all.
One of the prerequisites of getting over an ex is to be single and alone.
If you attempt to rebound or replace your ex with a new partner, it won’t solve your issues.
True growth comes from doing what is difficult and scary.
Be single and build a life without your ex.
When you can be single and happy, that’s when you are in the perfect position to meet someone new and consider a new relationship.
For now, spend as much time as you can dealing with your pain and heartbreak.
Work through your emotions and let go of your ex.
If you don’t do it now, it will just come back to bite you in the ass later on.
Being Single Is Great
Especially if you make the most of it, you could live some of the best or months of your life during this time.
Spend time implementing the techniques in this article. I can promise you that it will help you grow and heal in ways that you’ve been trying to do so for a long time.
It’s hard. I know. I’ve been through it so I understand the pain ahead of you but after the pain is a whole lot of happiness.
Before you go, think about this for just a second. Eventually, you’re going to meet someone new and fall in love. You may enter a relationship and end up married.
That means you’ll no longer be single for a VERY long time, perhaps even your entire life.
Instead of spending this precious time crying over why you’re single, spend it having the time of your life and growing as an individual!
Get after it!