We live in a world of instant messaging and yet some people do not grasp that concept. Punctuality is a virtue to be upheld and maintained. And yet, some people can’t seem to do it. When someone takes forever to text back, it’s either a sign of low interest, low value or poor punctuality.
Here’s the thing though – you really can’t do anything about it other than return the favor.
It’s not about being petty.
We get to negotiate the kind of life we want and the type of behavior we deem acceptable.
By allowing someone to take forever to text back, especially when you make a conscious effort to text them punctually, you devalue yourself.
I understand that people are busy and life is unpredictable. If someone takes forever to text back on a few odd occasions, it’s perfectly okay. Give them a pass.
But when it’s a common occurrence and you start to feel disrespected, ignored or undervalued, then it’s a problem you should address.
How to deal with someone who takes forever to text back
Ordinarily, I wouldn’t be upfront about it, especially within a romantic context because I don’t want to make the person feel like I’m desperate for their attention when we barely even know each other.
But, if I do actually care, then it would be perfectly okay to approach them about it.
The approach is something to consider. If you blow up at them or act rude, it’s going to make you look bitter and annoying.
Rather than him or her leaving the conversation feeling like they should consider being more punctual and considerate, they feel annoyed and kind of uninterested.
A better approach is one that’s non-confrontational but to the point.
“Hey, I wish we could talk more but you take forever to reply. Try speeding up a bit.”
It’s chilled. It’s calm. And it’s a fairly positive approach.
But if you feel like this individual is being disrespectful and you would prefer a more confrontational approach to set the boundaries of acceptable behavior, you could try the following.
“Listen, I understand you may be busy but it’s starting to come across as rude and inconsiderate that you take this long to reply.“
I think it gets the point across and holds him or her accountable.
But, instead, I would just act the way they do. When someone takes forever to text back on a number of different occasions, I just stop texting back altogether.
If they care and actually reach out to find out why then I’ll explain that I didn’t want to continue beating a dead horse of a conversation.
The message from my action and my text becomes clear – I will not waste my time on you if you are not interested in talking or texting me.
I’m not rude about it or harsh. If they’re apologetic and willing to meet me halfway then I’m more than receptive to it.
The worst thing you can do is turn into an ugly bitter person who is ridiculously rude to someone who comes back and tries to make an effort.
Be that as it may, I think it’s far more productive to spend your time and effort on people who are within your circle and have a high interest in communicating with you.
What’s the point of chasing after someone who isn’t interested or too busy to reply to a text message when you can be surrounded by those who would love to be with you.
You can double text to make sure they’re okay or to share additional information.
When it comes to courting someone over text and if you decide to double text, be wary of sending a second text that comes across as needy or desperate.
Not everyone you start to text with may prioritize you at first. They may test you by purposely taking longer to reply to judge your reaction.
In such a case, indifference and inaction may be your best friend.
With that being said, I hope you found this article to be of some help to you. I’d love to know what you normally do when someone who takes forever to text back.
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