Most women don’t realize they’re chasing a guy until they scare him off. It’s unfortunate because you could very well be a fantastic person who would make an amazing partner. Which is why it’s imperative that you study all these signs you are chasing him.
The number one way to chase a guy out of your life is to chase after him. Why? Because it devalues your worth. It can also be overwhelming to someone who doesn’t feel as strongly about you as yet.
The problem with chasing guys is that it puts you at a disadvantage.
Not only are you trying to win his approval but you’re also trying to manage your expectations and feelings.
The amount of investment you end up putting into this guy is astronomically uneven compared to his investment.
This will only heighten your desire and even desperation to get him.
Rather than behaving in an attractive and compelling way, you risk looking desperate, clingy and needy.
Here’s a quick overview of the signs you are chasing him:
- You compliment him all the time.
- You drop everything to talk to him.
- You are always the one calling and texting first.
- You try to convince him to be exclusive with you.
- You buy him gifts.
- You’re always carrying the conversations.
- You agree with everything he says and does.
With that being said, let’s analyze each of these signs you are chasing him in more detail to understand how they present themselves in real-life situations so that you can avoid them.
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1. You compliment him all the time
We can’t help but compliment those who make a good impression on us but this tends to get out of hand when you like a guy and want to be with him.
Constantly showering him with compliments even when he doesn’t deserve it devalues the worth of your admiration.
Just because you’re complimenting him all the time doesn’t necessarily result in him liking you.
If anything, it removes some of the mystery from the situation and gives him a solid idea of how much you like and adore him.
Focus more on having fun with him and learning more about his personality on a deeper level.
This will be far more enriching than complimenting him all the time.
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2. You drop everything to talk to him
A woman who has a fulfilling life often values her time spent on things and people outside of just a guy. Put simply, she wouldn’t drop everything she’s doing just to sit on the phone all day and talk to him.
To ensure that a man values your time and effort, it is imperative that you make him earn it.
By only rewarding him with your time when he makes an effort to talk or be with you.
Focus on simply living your life and paying attention to those things and people who are important to you.
Dropping everything you’re doing just to talk to him doesn’t make him only feel important.
On the contrary, it can actually work against you by painting a picture of you to be desperate or easy to get.
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3. You are always the one calling and texting him first
This sort of behavior doesn’t translate well when you aren’t in a relationship.
Part of what increases attraction is the longing for someone. You can only long for someone when they are not around at times.
This time away will give him an opportunity to miss you and reach out.
A good way to test if someone really likes you and enjoys talking to you is to stop messaging or calling them first.
If they reach out and express how much they miss you, then that proves it’s not one sided.
But, if they don’t, well then that just proves it’s not reciprocal and this was one of the signs you are chasing him.
4. You try to convince him to be exclusive with you
For the most part, I generally assume that a woman will let a man know through hints and signs that she’s ready to be exclusive.
Sometimes, you may even come outright and ask him where are thing’s going.
At this point, I advise men who are interested in a relationship to make things official.
Unfortunately, if a guy makes an excuse for not wanting to be exclusive and shoots you down every time you hint at being with him, he just isn’t that into you right now.
Continuously making an effort and asking him to be exclusive is a sign you’re chasing him.
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5. You buy him gifts
Unless you’re dealing with a materialistic driven man, gifts and money will never earn you his undivided attention or commitment.
When a man truly likes or loves a woman, he’ll enjoy her company for what it is and not for what he can get from it.
Gifts are okay on special occasions but for the most part, it’s a poor way of courting someone and one of the telltale signs you are chasing him and trying to buy his attention.
6. You’re always carrying the conversation
Much like how you love and enjoy talking to him as much as you can, most men who like you will absolutely feel the same way.
They’ll be dying to learn more about you.
Not only will he make the time to talk but he’ll be fully immersed in conversation with you.
He’ll ask questions about your life and pass as well as pay close attention to the things you say.
Having an effortless conversation comes with the territory of love. That’s how two people truly connect on a deeper level.
But if the only one doing all the talking is you, then that is indicative of his low level of interest.
Only a woman who is chasing a guy would endure a one sided conversation with him. I’m sure that if it were another guy, you probably wouldn’t put up with a lack of effort, right?
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7. You agree with everything he says and does
There’s a fine line between compromise and desperate acceptance. The latter often comes at the cost of your own needs, want and even your self-respect.
To win his approval, you feel compelled to agree with everything he says and does to avoid scaring him off in any way.
This is definitely one of the signs you are chasing him because ordinarily, a healthy relationship dictates respect and compromise.
In other words, you both find a compromise in an attempt to respect each other.
Trying to win him over with this approach is actually a sign of weakness as well.
You are an individual with beliefs, opinions, ethics and values. And they are just as important as his.
There’s no need to agree with everything he says or does to win his heart.
If anything, men respect and admire women who stand their ground and hold them to a higher standard.
Why you should stop chasing him
The number one reason why you shouldn’t chase him is this – you deserve better.
Why should you invest so much time, investment, energy and effort on someone who actually doesn’t appreciate it?
That makes no sense to me. If I’m being brutally honest with you, it’s disrespectful to yourself.
There’s a fine line between pursuing a guy and chasing him. The former is romantic and sweet. It’s often rewarded with appreciation and mutual effort.
Two people who pursue each other often show similar patterns of effort. They emulate each other in a lot of ways.
That strengthens the connection.
In every single one of my relationships that were healthy and good always had a component of mutual effort.
The people I chased never really gave me the time of day and the ones who chased me rarely got my attention.
Look back at your past and try to pinpoint a time when you chased someone successfully or had someone chase you into their arms. I’m more than certain it barely happened.
As I mentioned at the beginning of this article, chasing him may encourage you to behave in a manner that makes you appear desperate, needy, clingy or weird.
And if you really analyze the concept of chasing someone, it usually indicates running after someone. They are the prize and you’re working hard to win them.
But, the prize is moving forward with every step you take. So, you’re exerting all this effort but never actually getting closer to the prize.
Isn’t that a waste of time?
You want to pursue men who have an interest in you. Then it’s okay because you’ll be chasing each other.
But, it’s not too late. So long as he still exhibits some interest and attraction for you, things can be salvaged.
I would recommend that you start to back off gradually and let him come to you. When someone misses you, it can change things around completely.
Their attraction for you could sky rocket.
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What I’ve learned is that attraction and love develop when you are present and absent from someone’s life. Just long enough for them to start missing you and reach out.
One thing I can guarantee from this article is that if you stop chasing him and people in general, you’ll gain clarity on who really cares about you.
Those who don’t appreciate you will eventually vanish but those who genuinely care and love you will gravitate towards you.
In that way, you can spend your life on the right people.
With that being said, I hope you found this article on the signs you are chasing him to be insightful. Please leave your questions and thoughts in the comment section below.