If you have ever lost someone, you would know that the feelings you carry in your heart do not instantly disappear. For a long time, they linger and remind you of what was and what has been lost. The end of a relationship is no exception. In today’s article, I want to share a list of signs your ex is over you.
The reason why it is imperative that you familiarize yourself with this list of signs your ex is over you is because it may provide a reason to let go.
You can never truly prepare yourself for the loss of a loved one to death or a breakup. Often, people describe it as a premature ending to an important story.
The memories, dreams and feelings left behind will fight against reality.
It will insert doubt into your mind and heart whenever you try to move on and let go of your ex.
You’ll hold onto hope of reconciliation but this comes with the risk of interpreting reality incorrectly and wasting precious time, energy and sanity on something that is not meant to be.
I feel like we all deserve the chance to be happy.
We deserve to be loved and we deserve to have someone who wants to remain a part of our lives as much as want to be a part of their life.
But, you can’t make space for someone else to enter your life when you are fixated on the idea of your ex returning.
If you feel like months have passed and you have not made any progress in moving on, accepting the breakup and feeling at ease with being single, then this article is most applicable to you.
1. Your ex doesn’t text you anymore
Whenever I think about someone I care about, if they’re not near me or if I haven’t seen them for a little bit, I’ll make an effort to text them.
My interest is almost palpable and my texts are enthusiastic and engaging.
We live in a time when instant gratification is rampant.
Most of us are addicted to dopamine hits and one of the easiest, quickest and most popular forms of instant gratification is texting.
Why wouldn’t someone who cares about you make the time to text?
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Why would they deprive themselves of that feel good hormone by reaching out to you or replying to your texts?
The only time they wouldn’t is if they no longer care about you or they’re trying to move on from you.
It is reasonable to deduce that a lack of texts is one of the signs your ex is over you.
Related post: Should I stop texting him?
2. Your ex doesn’t take your calls
I’m willing to bet that if you still care about your ex and fought against the breakup, that you’ve tried to get your ex on the phone.
Even if you called under the pretense of returning something, acquiring some information or checking up on them, you called because you missed them and wanted to hear their voice.
The fact that your ex not only rejects your calls but also makes no attempt to return your missed calls is a clear indicator that your ex doesn’t want to talk.
Unless your ex has something to be angry about, the only reason I can think of explaining why they don’t take or return your calls anymore is because they’re over you.
It’s even worse if your ex is ghosting you despite it being clear that they are receiving your texts and missed calls.
Nobody who wants to be someone would ever do something like this.
I know it’s hard to accept but if days or weeks are going by and your ex is not calling or taking any of your calls, I think it might be time for you to face reality.
Related post: How to respond to ghosting
3. Your ex has blocked you
I’ll be the first to admit that just because someone blocks you doesn’t mean they’re over you. During those early weeks of a breakup, people react impulsively.
They may block you only to unblock you a couple of days later and this may go on for a few times.
It’s the drastic change and emotional turmoil that influences people to react erratically.
Despite your ex being the one to end the relationship, they are not immune to the effects of a split.
You can try to prepare for it but it’s something that will still affect you as the dumper.
Those early days of being blocked after a breakup is more a case of your ex trying to get ahead of the situation and avoid facing the consequences of their actions.
They don’t want to see you in pain nor do they want to risk talking to you while in this state because they still care about you.
It’s an attempt to put as much distance between the two of you in hopes of breaking the bond.
Sometimes it works whilst other times it drives them crazy until they unblock you.
However, when weeks or months have passed and your ex hasn’t unblocked you, then it’s fair to say that this is definitely a sign your ex is over you.
Nobody who is still hung up on an ex blocks them for months unless they were dumped and needed to use extreme measures to accept the end of the relationship.
Additionally, exes who are terribly upset and angry may keep you blocked until those feelings run out and they’re ready to communicate with you or not at all.
Related post: Why did my ex block me out of nowhere? (solved)
4. Your ex doesn’t flirt with you at all anymore
Not all people choose to close communication after a breakup but that’s okay.
As much as I advocate for no contact to allow both parties to heal, it’s not a hard rule and sometimes people can stay in contact to help each other heal.
I’ve seen exes become good friends with each other but only in the case of those who both accepted and agreed to the breakup.
However, I would be remiss not to mention how a lot of people agree to be friends with an ex only as a means of winning them back.
This inauthentic agreement often results in wasted time and further rejection which is why you need to be upfront about your intentions.
Now, if you stay in contact and try to flirt, you want to observe whether your ex is reciprocating as well as initiating.
If they do, that’s an indication of residual feelings of attraction.
If they don’t, then that’s one of the signs your ex is over you and is drawing a line.
5. Your ex is dating new people
This is a tricky one because we know of many people who rebound after a breakup only to try and escape the feelings they still have for their ex and the pain of breaking up.
They’re making an attempt to fill a void with someone else whom they find attractive but that mostly fails because you cannot fit someone else in a void that is shaped in the size of an ex.
You have to allow time to work it’s magic and you have to make an effort to redesign a life for yourself as a single person to create a new empty space that can be molded for a new partner.
Anything else and you’re just fooling yourself and being set up for more pain and disappointment.
So, I just want it to be known that an ex who jumps right back into the dating scene can very well not be over you at all.
The caveat is if they spent months falling out of love with you before breaking up or it’s been a few months since they two of you have split.
Let’s say that your ex took the time to be alone and they worked on being happy again by themselves.
It’s highly possible that they have now reached a point of moving on and want to meet someone new because they’re over you.
I know this hurts to hear but this is the usual pattern of behavior from someone who has actually moved on from an ex.
Don’t get me wrong, they could still care about you as a person but they may not be in love with you anymore.
6. Your ex is in love with someone else
One of the main reasons why I advise people who have been dumped to walk away is because the pain of watching their ex fall in love with someone else should be avoided.
It doesn’t serve you in any way and they can’t be blamed for just living their life and moving on.
Trust me, I know how much it sucks to deal with something like this but why put yourself through this kind of pain or torture?
You’re much better off walking away and giving yourself a chance to move forward by avoiding unnecessary pain from a chapter that may completely be over.
Easier said than done, I understand.
But, most things in life that matter don’t come easily.
Your peace of mind and contentment of heart will require you to do something painful or difficult like walking away from your ex when the relationship fails and you’ve tried to win them back without success.
Then, it’s time to pack up and leave with your dignity intact.
There’s no easy way to say this but I don’t believe that a person can be in love with two people at the same time.
So, if your ex is in love with someone else, it’s likely that they are over you.
Related post: Why did she leave me for someone else?
7. Your ex wants their stuff back
Typically, when an ex starts demanding for their stuff back or brings up the idea of distributing shared assets, it’s probably safe to assume that they are over you and want to part completely.
For many reasons, this is probably confusing and painful to you.
Correctly me if I’m wrong but you’re struggling to even get to this because you’re not even thinking about belongings.
Your focus has been on salvaging the relationship or hoping that things will change so these things seem unimportant to you right now.
The fact that your ex is asking for their stuff now indicates to me that they have made a few steps forward compared to you.
Let’s be honest, a husband or wife isn’t going to discuss redistribution of assets or collecting all their belongings if they had the intention of coming back home and working things through with you.
It may be difficult to accept but this is definitely a sign your ex is over you.
8. Your ex doesn’t show any concern about you
When I was younger, I would mistake rudeness and anger as a sign that someone doesn’t care about their ex.
Only in adulthood, when I found myself embroiled in the complexity of a messy breakup did I piece together a new picture of understanding pertaining to emotions.
People who lash out or speak harshly to an ex are not devoid of feelings.
They actually do care about their ex but these feelings are being expressed poorly.
It’s actually indifference that’s the scariest sign your ex is over you.
Indifference can be described or explained as a lack of concern or care.
Nothing you say or do makes any difference to your ex because they have long since moved on from you.
They’re devoid of feelings which is why they come across as so cold, stoic and disinterested.
At times, they may project decency but you’ll never feel the warmth of emotion which you once did.
If you are experiencing this right now with your ex, then I’m sorry to say but your ex is over you.
Related post: How to stop loving someone who doesn’t love you
In conclusion
Believe me when I say to you that I understand how you feel. Your heart wants what it wants and you should not feel guilty about that.
There’s nothing shameful about loving someone even if they don’t feel the same way about you anymore.
But, unrequited love is wasted if it is channeled towards the wrong source.
Unfortunately, your ex who once held onto your love is no longer the correct recipient for it.
Instead of hurting yourself any further by pursuing them, why don’t you channel all that love inwardly because you deserve some kindness and comfort right now.
And when you have the strength to let go of your ex, channel all that love towards the people who are still in your life.
Suffering is described as wanting reality to be other than it is.
When you face reality, even if it hurts, you’ll also catch sight of a future that isn’t plagued by pain, loss, grief and yearning.
You’ll grow from this and you’ll learn to be happy again without needing someone to be with you.
With that being said, I hope you found this article on the signs your ex is over you to be thought provoking and eye-opening. If you would like to share your thoughts or questions on this topic, please feel free to do so by visiting the comment section below.