Lately, you’ve noticed that your partner or ex has been acting awfully towards you and things have been less than ideal. You’re afraid that he might not love you anymore but you’re uncertain. In this article, I’m going to share the most comprehensive list of signs he doesn’t love you anymore.
Hopefully, by identifying these signs and understanding why or how they appear in real-life situations, you’ll be able to implement some changes that save your relationship or helps you to move on.
With that being said, let’s get straight into these 30 signs he doesn’t love you anymore.
1. He doesn’t say he loves you anymore
Granted, loving someone extends beyond those three special words and actions do matter but if you find that neither his actions nor his words are loving, it might, unfortunately, be one of the main signs he doesn’t love you anymore.
Think about how often he used to say that he loves you.
A transition from constantly expressing how much he loves you to not even saying it back when you do is concerning.
If everything else in your relationship is great, then perhaps having a casual conversation with him about it might help.
I know that married couples tend to verbalize their love less because it becomes an unspoken truth that is understood and displayed daily.
But, when it’s something that has stopped following other problems in the relationship which we will discuss further on, then it could be cause for concern.
Related post: How to deal with loving someone you can’t have
2. He doesn’t pay attention when you speak
When you love someone, it’s hard to take your eyes off them. You want to soak up every moment with them and absorb a lot of what they say.
This is the person you love and when they speak, it matters to you.
That level of attention comes naturally to people who are still in love.
In this case, when you find that he barely makes any effort to pay attention and seems completely disinterested in the things you say, it’s a problem.
A healthy and loving relationship thrives on good communication.
A significant part of conversing with each other is paying attention and listening.
Someone who is in love with you will pay attention because they’re always looking for clues on how to make you happy and keep you happy.
A man who doesn’t love you anymore won’t be as interested in what you think or voice out loud.
3. He seems distant
When a man is distant, he can be in your presence and still not actually be with you.
His mind will be preoccupied, he won’t be paying attention to what you’re saying or doing and his affection will start to diminish.
You may not seem much of him, he cuts your calls short and is often deep in thought.
This distance can be attributed to a number of reasons such as work problems, family issues, personal issues or not being in love with you anymore.
It’s hard to pinpoint the exact reason when he won’t open up and is barely present in your life.
It becomes more likely that this is a sign he doesn’t love you anymore when it’s something that has been going on for a while, there have been underlying relationship issues that preceded this phase and he exhibits more of the signs in this article.
4. He barely replies to your texts
I read an article on Inc.com that shared an interesting statistic about the average person’s phone usage.
Apparently, we unlock our phones at least 150 times per day and send or receive approximately 94 texts per day.
During those 150 unlocks and 94 texts, how often are you receiving a reply from your man?
Surely, he can find a few minutes to text you, especially when you have been reaching out to him frequently.
I’m not saying that this is a guaranteed sign that he doesn’t love you anymore because some people are poor texters and prefer to call or meet in person.
And, he could be extremely busy.
But, when a guy suddenly seizes texting you when he had no problem texting you all the time before, that’s a bad sign.
The longer this goes on, the more we should worry.
Additionally, analyze the context of his texts and the replies themselves.
Do they look the same as they were during a loving time in the relationship? Does he seem passive-aggressive or completely disinterested? Does he say sweet things to you over text anymore?
Related post: What to do when someone ignores your text
5. He doesn’t touch you
Depending on different cultural backgrounds and religious beliefs, physical contact is not an indicator of love before marriage.
But, when he stops hugging you, holding your hand or even being physically close to you, there’s something wrong.
Healthy relationships are accompanied by a desire for each other.
Ofcourse, acting on that desire is dependent on a number of different factors and personal beliefs.
However, if your man doesn’t even want to touch you in any way and is uptight around you, it’s a sign of a problem.
6. He doesn’t make an effort to be romantic
What is a relationship with romance? An agreement to accompany each other? A friendship? It’s unnatural for a romantic relationship to have no romance.
Understandably, men get lazy in relationships. We see it all the time. I’ve been guilty of this from time to time in my life.
We get comfortable in a long term relationship and fall into a routine.
We stop making as much of an effort to be romantic because we just assume that you know and feel the love we have for you.
But, that’s obviously not how things should be and via communication, a man can snap out of this phase and resume being romantic.
He may just need a small wake-up call and he’ll be back to his old romantic self.
However, things take a turn for the worse when he chooses not to be romantic because he doesn’t feel like it or want to.
Despite your many attempts to communicate your dissatisfaction over this and countless fights, he continues to make no effort whatsoever and shows no fear of losing you.
Now, this is one of the worst signs he doesn’t love you anymore.
7. He no longer initiates dates
A relationship cannot be sustained or nurtured without spending time together.
The best way for couples to spend time together is on dates.
This is time exclusively spent on the development of love and romance.
It’s quality time that every couple needs in order to thrive and feel satisfied in the relationship.
What happens is that when a man no longer initiates dates, you see less of him.
The less you see of him, the more distance it puts between the two of you.
This can result in a loss of communication and frustration that spills over into all your conversations.
Suddenly, he becomes the most distant person on the planet who rarely replies to your texts and shows a lot of disinterest in the relationship.
And all this simply stemmed from him not facilitating dates to spend time with each other.
Do you now understand why this is one of the signs he doesn’t love you anymore?
Why wouldn’t a man who loves you not want to see you and be in your presence?
Related post: Why do I feel lonely in my relationship?
8. He doesn’t want to be seen in public with you
Some people are not comfortable with public displays of affection (PDA) and that is perfectly normal.
Nobody should be forced to do something they’re not comfortable with and I respect that completely.
What isn’t normal is your man trying to avoid being seen with you in public at all.
There’s something fishy going on, especially if this wasn’t an issue in the past.
And if it was an issue, there hasn’t been a fair or reasonable explanation that doesn’t concern you.
This could be indicative of a number of issues but one of the most concerning would be that he doesn’t love you anymore.
There’s a fine line between keeping your private life out of the public eye to not wanting to be seen with your partner by anyone at all.
9. He’s on his phone all the time
Unless he’s a workaholic, social media marketer or mobile gamer, there’s really no reason for him to be on his phone all the time.
This is even more problematic when he’s secretive with his phone, flinches when you even try to touch it, doesn’t ever let you use his phone and is constantly texting, even when he’s with you.
It could be nothing or it could be a sign that he doesn’t love you anymore because his interest is diverted elsewhere, specifically in someone else.
You need to have an honest conversation with him and establish some boundaries.
10. He constantly criticizes you
One of the most popular and common characteristics of love is adoration.
A compelling attraction for your partner’s qualities makes you burst with joy and pride.
When that’s missing and is replaced with criticism over how you talk, dress, look, act and think, it’s a problem.
That’s not synonymous with love by any means.
If anything, it’s the opposite and indicates a loss of love and admiration.
11. He bickers and argues with you about silly things
On one hand, bickering and arguing can be a sign of love because you care about so much and your personality types tend to butt heads often.
This is the case with two people who are very opinionated, stubborn and strong-willed.
They may bicker and argue but their love for each other is strong and stable.
On the other hand, when a relationship dynamic makes a drastic change from loving, calm and nurturing to chaotic and explosive with bickering and huge arguments, it’s problematic.
People who fall out of love with each other tend to behave this way.
Additionally, this sort of behavior itself tends to make a couple grow apart and fall out of love.
Do not ignore this issue if it’s a new one because it could be one of the signs he doesn’t love you anymore.
12. He talks about breaking up
When the quality of your relationship has diminished significantly and the happiness that once accompanied you is no longer present, it wouldn’t surprise me that one or both of you want to walk away.
Granted, all relationships hit a rough patch.
If you can work through your issues, it’s highly possible that you come out of them with a relationship that is stronger than it ever has been.
The only way this can happen is if both of you still love each other and want to work on your relationship.
If your partner is talking about splitting and he seems dead serious about it, the reason for his departure is probably because he doesn’t love you anymore in the way that he used to.
He may still care about you but he may not be in love.
Related post: If you love someone, should you let them go?
13. He hasn’t tried to be intimate with you
Intimacy of all kinds is important in any healthy, long-term and serious relationship.
In fact, one of the major warning signs that a serious relationship like marriage is falling apart is when a couple stops having sex.
A man who pulls away from you and doesn’t initiate or show interest in making love with you is displaying problematic behavior.
I don’t blame you for freaking out about this because it’s worrying. It makes you feel uncertain and paranoid.
- Perhaps he doesn’t love you anymore.
- Perhaps he’s suffering from a health condition that he isn’t disclosing to you.
- Perhaps he’s sleeping with someone else.
There could be any reason for it.
You have to find out why this is happening and seek out counseling if the two of you struggle to communicate effectively.
Just keep in mind that this won’t apply if you haven’t really been intimate with each other or plan on taking things very slowly.
14. He seems irritated and annoyed around you
When I think about the times I’m irritated or annoyed with someone, it doesn’t necessarily strike me that I don’t love that person anymore.
You’ll always drift in and out of these moods when you live with someone.
But, when irritation and annoyance are constant and it’s never accompanied by phases of excitement, adoration, care and affection, then there’s an issue which could signal that he doesn’t love you anymore.
Think about it – why would you not like your partner?
You’d have to be falling out of love with them to constantly be irritated and annoyed by everything they do.
Alternatively, a man who feels frustrated and unheard in a relationship could be feeling resentful and it’s manifesting itself in this way.
One reason indicates a sign he doesn’t love you anymore whereas the other indicates a situational issue that doesn’t deal with a loss of love.
15. He won’t commit to any future plans
When you’re in love with someone, it’s natural to think about the future with that person.
The desire to experience life with them motivates you to make future plans with them.
Whether this is relationship plans or life plans, you don’t shy away from it because you’re so excited to be with them.
Unless you’re dealing with a man who has commitment issues, he won’t resist committing to future plans with you.
Even if he wants to take things slow, there’s a sense of comfort and commitment in his words and actions.
What’s problematic is if he avoids anything to do with a commitment for the future with you.
Additionally, he goes back on his words and starts to downgrade existing plans and progress you’ve made as a couple.
That’s usually considered a sign he doesn’t love you any more or is in the process of losing feelings for you.
16. He says he has doubts about the relationship
Adding to the sign discussed above, when things have been going downhill for a while and he finally opens up, it could be that he has doubts about the relationship or his feelings for you.
This revelation might be scary and shocking to you but it’s something you can work with.
Doubts usually appear when a man is falling out of love or just doesn’t love you anymore but is staying in the relationship out of attachment and comfort.
I find this really difficult to talk about because I can understand how upsetting this might be to you but we have to face reality in order to deal with this.
17. He doesn’t keep his promises anymore
Relationships thrive on honesty and commitment. To be honest and committed, you have to keep your word.
Granted, you may fail at times but the intention should always be to keep your promises.
If a man loves you, he’ll keep his promises or he’ll try to keep his promises.
He’ll make an effort, even if he has had issues with that before.
A man who doesn’t love you anymore won’t bother about promises made to you because he doesn’t care anymore.
18. He’s in love with someone else
You can’t be in love with two people at the same time so if he’s in love with someone else, it’s a sign he doesn’t love you anymore.
He could care about you and still be attached to you.
But, when it comes to actually loving you as a romantic partner, that has probably changed.
The only thing you can do right now is to focus on moving on and working on your own happiness because he’s just unavailable right now.
19. He’s just unhappy with you all the time
Sometimes it just happens that two people who were once in love start to grow apart.
Everyone changes. It’s a natural result of time, experience and maturity.
It’s highly possible that you have both grown into different people and in doing so, outgrew the relationship.
This is a difficult situation to be in because neither of you may be doing anything wrong.
What has happened is that the dynamic of the relationship has changed and it no longer fulfills him or you in the way that it once did.
Love thrives on happiness and during tough times, love endures through the hope of happiness in the future.
When neither happiness or the hope of it exists, the chances of love surviving are slim to none.
20. He gaslights you
Gaslighting is a form of deception and manipulation in which a person makes you doubt your own memory or perception of events.
In other words, rather than admit to mistakes or their flaws, they’ll paint you to be wrong or crazy.
This can be exhausting and emotionally draining for someone who is trying to save their relationship.
I would go so far as to say that it’s a form of sabotage because this person is creating more unhappiness and problems for the relationship.
Gaslighting isn’t loving, especially when it’s used to make you the bad guy and to evade change.
21. He ignores you
A man who loves you will not only be affectionate but he’ll be attentive. A man who is selfish, immature, childish or just not in love with you will ignore you.
Furthermore, he’ll treat you like a second grade citizen.
Granted, there are times when I’ve written about how ignoring someone can make them chase you.
But, that doesn’t apply within a relationship or towards a good and loving partner.
A man should never ignore a woman who loves him and who is making every effort to be a good partner.
If he constantly ignores you and acts as if you don’t exist, I think it’s one of the signs he doesn’t love you anymore.
22. He’s not supportive of you
One of the ways in which love is expressed is through support and comfort. Life can be extremely challenging at times and this can weigh heavily on your soul.
Having someone to lean on can make a huge difference in your well being.
When a man fails to show up for you and would rather be doing anything other than supporting you during those low moments in your life, then he isn’t all that loving.
We could argue that he doesn’t love you anymore or else he would be affected to see you going through a rough patch and not being there for you.
But, he isn’t feeling that way and he doesn’t really care.
23. He humiliates you
I’ve always been told by my mother and the women in my life that it’s a man’s duty to protect his woman’s image, especially when it is being threatened wrongfully.
When I hear stories about men who embarrass and degrade their partners verbally and to other people, I cringe and feel angry about it.
This is disgusting behavior. It’s not loving at all.
If this is something your man does regularly and he doesn’t seem apologetic at all or invested in changing his ways, I would seriously reconsider your relationship because this is one of the worst warning signs he doesn’t love you.
24. He is abusive and manipulative
There is absolutely no room for abuse and manipulation of any kind in a relationship.
As a woman, you don’t deserve to be treated this way by any man.
Nothing about this can be argued as acceptable or justifiable.
A man who beats you up and constantly exposes you to emotional and psychological abuse does not love you, period!
25. He constantly lies to you
Honesty is a fundamental element of any healthy relationship.
Granted, we all tell lies to varying degrees and none of us are perfect.
But, it is imperative that we always try to be better and to be as honest as possible with our partners.
When these constant lies become a regular issue in your relationship and they cause you to stress without any remorse from your partner, you have to consider the possibility that he doesn’t love you anymore.
It’s not always the case but it’s pointing towards a problem that needs to be addressed.
26. He needs a break from you
Two people who are in love with each other will experience an undying desire to be with each other.
The whole idea of needing a break from your relationship doesn’t make much sense to me.
There’s a difference between asking for some space and asking for a break.
The former can be a healthy request, especially if the two of you have been spending too much time together and not focusing on your individual goals as well.
The latter is actually a sign he doesn’t love you anymore because guys and girls tend to ask for a break when they are preparing themselves to part ways.
Now, this isn’t always the case but most of the time, it is.
Related post: He likes me but doesn’t want a relationship
27. He’s never jealous or protective
At this point, we are scraping the barrel here and I would suggest that this sign is more supplementary in nature.
What I mean by this is that alone, this is not anything to be worried about.
But, when accompanied by other signs in this article, then it becomes something to consider.
To some degree, we all feel some jealousy and we would hate to lose our partner to someone else.
If that doesn’t exist at all, not because of complete faith in the relationship but because of a lack of interest or feelings, then he probably is falling out of love.
28. He is happy without you
When you’ve been through a breakup and want your ex back, it can be tempting to hold onto hope and wait for them.
You start to assume that just because you’re so unhappy without him that he must be feeling the same way too.
That’s not really the case. Everyone is unique and we all react to change differently.
He may be completely happy without you or the relationship.
I know how terribly this can sting but it’s something you must acknowledge and be willing to accept.
It can save you from a ton of further rejection and disappointment.
29. He removed any trace of you from his social media
One of the tell-tale signs someone is moving on from a relationship is when they remove pictures and posts of an ex from their social media.
It could be one of the first things someone does or one of the last.
Usually, when it’s the last thing they do at the end of a relationship, it’s usually because they don’t love you anymore.
This is one of the last steps they take to close that chapter of their life while moving into the next one.
30. He doesn’t want anything to do with you
Let’s say that you’ve done everything you can to make things work or to get him back but it doesn’t work.
He no longer takes your calls, doesn’t reply to any of your texts, blocks you on social media and months or years have passed since you’ve last heard from him.
And if you manage to get a hold of him, he asks you to leave him alone or not to contact him anymore.
Take him by his word because this is definitely one of the strongest signs he doesn’t love you anymore.
By this point, I’m hoping that you have a good idea of exactly what signs apply to your relationship or situation because it can help you to possibly save it or to walk away from it without further damage to your heart and mind.
I know how traumatic it can be to deal with something like this, especially when you still love and care about him.
It’s sad but try to remember that in all of our lives, most of the relationships we have will not last.
The one that does last is the relationship we were actually destined for.
With that being said, I hope this article on the signs he doesn’t love you anymore was informative and helpful. Please feel free to leave your thoughts or questions in the comment section below.