After a breakup, it’s not uncommon to desire a fresh start, especially after suffering serious heartbreak. Perhaps you decide to initiate no contact and now you’re wondering, should I block my ex?
The answer is Yes and no. It depends on how likely you are to move on and be happy should you block your ex from all platforms of communication.
Some people prefer keeping the door open whereas others prefer a clean break.
What you decide to do will definitely be affected by the circumstances of the relationship and breakup as well as your goal or objective for blocking your ex.
In this article, I want to discuss all of the reasons you should block your ex as well as reasons not to block your ex. In the end, weigh the pros and cons of all these reasons and decide which is most applicable to you.
Reasons you should block your ex
The following reasons for why you should block your ex are some of the most important to consider. They prioritize what’s best for your future, your mental and emotional well being and your life in general.
1. You want closure and a clean break
One of the best things you can do after a traumatic breakup is to initiate no contact.
As much as it can be a useful strategy to get your ex back, it’s actual purpose is to facilitate closure and moving on.
After an extremely long relationship, I avoided cutting contact with my ex because of my fears and insecurities.
Not only did I make a series of bad decisions thereafter but witnessing my ex move on and post flowery social media updates stung me.
Once I cut contact, I was able to move through the different stages of moving on until I was happy again.
Trust me, those early days are brutal. Seeing your ex online or posting updates as if nothing changed in their life hurts and just adds fuel to the rejection.
This reason alone can save you from a tremendous amount of avoidable pain and suffering.
2. You want to avoid getting hurt or upset by your ex’s social media updates
Despite how much you may rationalize it in your head, you’re not going to feel good or okay with your ex moving on at first.
This is especially true fresh off a breakup and you were the one who was dumped.
You’re vulnerable and going through a drastic change in your life. Exposing yourself to updates of someone who is not going to be around anymore will hurt and worsen separation anxiety.
It’s just not therapeutic to be in contact when you’re in the middle of a breakup.
And if your ex is manipulative or vindictive, he or she could purposely share something online to hurt you.
You can avoid all of that by blocking your ex, even if it’s temporarily.
3. Your ex is a cheater
I have one rule in life that I adhere to no matter the circumstances and this is it – Never tolerate utterly disrespectful betrayal.
Not many things amount to that besides cheating.
There is no excuse for cheating on someone you love. Irrespective of their flaws and imperfections, you should not cheat.
More often than not, staying in contact does not mean you’re going to get any answers that will provide you with peace.
Another concern I have with cheaters is that they’re often manipulative and liars. Why do you want to keep someone like that in your life?
If your ex is a cheater, you should block your ex without hesitation.
4. Your ex is toxic and unhealthy for you
We only get what we negotiate for in life. When we allow people who diminish us to remain a fixture of our lives, we devalue our worth.
It is counterproductive to keep manipulative, selfish, arrogant, rude, ungrateful, deceptive or toxic people in our lives, irrespective of how attracted we are or were to them.
The bond shared with someone is no different than the bond we share with ourselves.
We must preserve our own sanity and well being in hopes of cultivating a life that is full of happiness and fulfillment.
None of that can be achieved by allowing toxic people in your life.
Choose yourself over toxic and unhealthy people or relationships.
5. You want to avoid unnecessary drama from him or her
As you get older, you start to realize how valuable peace of mind is. With so many things demanding your attention, dealing with unnecessary drama from an ex is pointless and of zero worth.
Stress is not something to play around with. If you’re someone who battles with anxiety or depression, you need to avoid drama like the plague.
So if this is a reason for why you want to block your ex, you have every right to do so.
6. Your ex is stalking or harassing you
It’s quite stressful and scary dealing with someone who refuses to let you move on with your life even though you’ve had the conversation with them over and over again.
Putting up with this behavior only encourages it.
Nip it in the bud as soon as you can. If your ex refuses to listen to reason, take action by blocking him or her.
Some people unravel after a breakup. Blocking your ex may be of more assistance to him or her than you can imagine.
Reasons you shouldn’t block your ex
Now that we have touched on the top reasons for why you should block your ex, let’s take a look and the reasons not to.
You’re probably wondering why, right?
Well, here’s the thing. Intention matters. Especially when making a decision that affects the heart.
To avoid experiencing regret, drama, stress, doubt and worry, you must consider all the possible outcomes to fully prepare yourself for what could happen.
1. You want to reconcile
Reconciliation can only be facilitated through communication. This does not mean you have to be talking all the time or chasing after your ex.
Blocking your ex only adds another layer of obstacles standing between the two of you.
It can also be misinterpreted by your ex to mean that you want nothing to do with him or her.
Ultimately, the choice is yours but I don’t see blocking your ex as a necessity to get them back. No contact is sufficient until he or she reaches out.
2. You both are capable of being friends
When breakups are mutually agreed upon, there’s room for friendship. Both parties feel the same about splitting up and see no reason in cutting all communication. The problem is solved.
And there’s nothing wrong with that.
If you are perfectly okay with seeing your ex move on and you have no romantic feelings for your ex, being friends shouldn’t be an issue.
The initial change from romantic partners to friends may be weird at first but you both will get used to it.
Lay down some ground rules and keep it platonic.
In such an instance, there’s absolutely no need to block your ex.
3. You want to play mind games with your ex
Trying to manipulate or mess with your ex by blocking him or her can blow up in your face.
Blocking someone is often looked at as a means of severing ties.
You always run the risk of never hearing from your ex again after blocking him or her for a significant amount of time. Even if you reach out, they may want nothing to do with you again.
Please keep that in mind before using the block feature as a tool for playing games.
This is actually an immature and unhealthy behavior. So, if your intentions are not sincere, don’t block your ex. It can cause way more harm than you think.
4. You’re not ready to cut him or her off just yet
I genuinely feel like there’s a right time and place for everything. Sure, you could just unblock your ex with the flick of a button but that doesn’t make it any less of a serious decision.
Just because it makes rational sense to block your ex doesn’t mean you’re emotionally ready for it.
Make the decision when you are certain of how you feel otherwise you are going to panic and flip flop between blocking and unblocking your ex.
Giving yourself the time and space to prepare emotionally and mentally will also prevent you from having any regrets.
Always trust your gut instinct
Rarely is it ever wrong! And I’ve come to realize how important it is to trust yourself during emotionally difficult situations.
One of the primary concerns we all go through is the fear of making a choice we regret.
It’s not so much about a bad outcome as much as it is about living with the idea that we didn’t do what felt right.
As such, you should highly prioritize what your gut is telling you.
Here’s something else to ask yourself – is this really going to matter?
If this is truly the end of your relationship, eventually you and your ex will completely move on with life.
There are some exes in my life who I haven’t spoken to in many years and it doesn’t make a difference to me at all. And I’m sure it’s the same for them.
Life goes on.
And when you finally discover love with someone else, your ex will eventually become an afterthought or no thought at all.
Take control of the situation
As much as I hate to say it, blocking your ex is a power move. And I think there are some merits to taking back some of your power after being dumped or treated poorly by your ex.
Ideally, whatever you decide to do should help facilitate healing. That’s what matters most.
So if this is the only way for you to gain some control of the situation or your life, then go for it.
Thereafter, channel that power into moving on after the breakup. Completely immerse yourself in self-care and personal development. That is the recipe for turning the lemons of life into lemonade.
Just to summarize, here’s a concise list of every important point we touched on in this article.
Reasons you should block your ex
- You want closure and a clean break.
- You want to avoid getting hurt or upset by your ex’s social media updates.
- Your ex is a cheater.
- Your ex is toxic and unhealthy for you.
- You want to avoid unnecessary drama from him or her.
- Your ex is stalking or harassing you.
Reasons you shouldn’t block your ex
- You want to reconcile.
- You both are capable of being friends.
- You want to play mind games with your ex.
- You’re not ready to cut him or her off just yet.
With that being said, I hope you found an answer to whether or not you should block your ex.
Feel free to share your thoughts in the comment section below.
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