If you’ve been fixating on your phone because she didn’t text back and you’re wondering to yourself, how long should I wait? Here’s the answer you’re looking for.
You should wait between 3 and 5 days before texting back. Do not send her unnecessary messages in hopes of gaining her attention because it will have an adverse effect by painting you as desperate or in pursuit.
During these stages of courtship, it is imperative to create an impression that facilitates the growth of attraction.
When a woman has to wonder about you, it creates the perfect breeding ground for attraction.
The fact that she has to wonder about you is an indicator that you have not chased her relentlessly and that your feelings of attraction are unclear.
This curiosity will spark interest and usually result in her reaching out to you.
At this point, all you have to do is ask her to meet you, and it’s game on.
Believe it or not, some women will actually not text back on purpose to test you.
This test is to determine how you will react. Usually, there are three common reactions.
- You start to text her incessantly, displaying your overwhelming interest and desperation.
- You get butthurt and either block her or say something off-putting.
- You wait for her to reach out, and when she does, you’re positive, upbeat, and assume the position of confidence.
Of all three reactions, which do you think promotes attraction and creates a confident impression?
My money is on option number 3.
This approach has never failed me.
Even if she wasn’t interested in me at first, by waiting for an extended period, her interest level in me starts to change.
At first, she may have perceived me to be too interested in her or not attractive enough, so she expects that I’ll chase her if she doesn’t respond to my text tentatively.
But when I reciprocate the same radio silence, she starts to wonder whether I am actually interested in her or not.
Try this out for yourself and let me know what happens. I’m willing to bet she will reach out to you.
As long as she finds you to be a 5 out of 10 on her attractive scale, the chance of her actually texting you back is significantly higher.
Let’s talk about how the three common reactions affect your opportunity to attract someone.
The Three Options You Have
Option 1: You start to text her incessantly
Nothing makes a woman feel like you’re desperate for her attention or overly attracted to her more than bombarding her phone with texts.
This is especially the case during the first phase of courtship.
And if you say the wrong things, not only does it have the chance of making you come across as desperate but weird as well.
Option 2: You get butthurt and either block her or say something off-putting
If you want a woman to think of you as insecure, controlling, and uncertain of yourself, react in this manner.
It’s a surefire way of ruining your chances with a woman.
The courting phase is often filled with anticipation, waiting, and wondering. If you act butthurt or behave obnoxiously, she’ll disqualify you at the drop of a hat.
Option 3: You wait for her to reach out
In my opinion, this is the best approach. For one, it eradicates the possibility of you appearing desperate or insecure.
Furthermore, it makes her think that you’re either very busy or have other options.
Even if you don’t, she’ll think about you and eventually reach out because her interest has been adequately piqued.
This works when she didn’t text back, and now you’re wondering how long I should wait.
What To Do If You Are Overtexting A Girl
Just stop! Immediately! Dial it back to a more moderate amount and get busy with living your life.
I think that the closest thing to a perfect partner is someone who has many layers to their personality and life.
Your purpose should not be a relationship, and it should be bigger than just finding a girlfriend.
In no way am I undermining the value and importance of having an amazing woman in your life.
But I would give this exact same advice to a woman.
Pursue other passions and interests outside of a relationship.
Why? Because there are valuable lessons and experiences that will mold you into a dynamic and wonderful person.
You can’t get all of that just by pursuing a partner.
When the initial honeymoon phase starts to disappear, it’s those other areas of your personality and life that start to matter.
So, when you have been overtexting a girl, stop and focus more on living your own life.
When she reaches out, get back to her when you can. Schedule a date as soon as possible and spend time in person.
This is the trick to building a strong connection.
There’s only so much that can be achieved via texting.
Sure, we live in a time when most people invest their effort in texting, but that can never replace real-life interaction.
Think about this: if you marry someone, will you be texting them or living with them in real life?
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Can Attraction Be Gaged From Texting?
Yes and no.
Here’s why it’s a double-barrel answer: If a woman texts you constantly, flatters you, and expresses her attraction for you, then the answer to that question is quite self-explanatory.
But, oftentimes, women don’t text as much.
Is that an indicator that she isn’t attracted to you?
Well, yes and no.
You have to take into account that some people are not the greatest texters. Others prefer to speak over the phone and meet in person rather than text.
If she is neither taking your calls nor has she texted you back, then it’s more likely that she isn’t as interested in you right now.
The best thing you could do is carry on with your life as normal, and if she reaches out to you, then you have another crack at it.
As a rule of thumb, don’t make too many assumptions while texting. It is often misleading and unpredictable.
Unless she is bombarding you with texts with an intense desire to see you or she has flat-out ignored your texts for an extended period of time, don’t read too much into her texting patterns.
Match your response time with hers.
If she takes days to reply to your texts, match that. If she replies relatively quickly, reply when you can, but don’t wait too long.
The Biggest Problem With Texting A Girl
It ruins all of the mystique surrounding the two of you.
When you meet someone new, it’s so thrilling and exciting to unravel them over time.
This leaves you fantasizing about the person and wondering about who they are on a deeper level.
Believe it or not, this is an important phase in any new potential relationship.
During this time, people tend to develop feelings of attraction. The fact that you are fantasizing about the person adds fuel to the fire.
By the time you get to see that person again, enough time has passed to build the anticipation to a ridiculous level.
Nowadays, guys just spew everything about themselves over text in a matter of days.
They take all of the mystery and fantasizing out of the equation.
Talk about creating a boring situation! Check out this article on how to be more mysterious.
What To Say When She Texted Back
Keep it short and sweet.
Let her know that she crossed your mind and that you’d love to see her soon.
Ask her if she is available on a certain day and make a date.
Alternately, ask her about what she’s been up to and then get back to her with a call.
In my opinion, during the early stages, save all the jokes and teasing for in-person interactions.
Too many men ruin a perfectly good situation by talking themselves out of it. The text messages that are supposed to be funny or playful come across completely wrong to the girl.
If you have a history of being ghosted after texting, then it’s time to face reality and come to terms with the fact that you currently don’t possess the prowess for texting.
What About Long Distance Relationships And Texting?
The same rule applies. Granted, you may need to text more than the average couple given the distance. But if she hasn’t replied to you as yet, then wait until she does.
Try to encompass more calls, especially video calls, so that the interaction can mimic real life as much as possible.
It will make a bigger impact in respect of attraction if the two of you can actually see each other while talking.
If she hasn’t replied in longer than a week, send out a second text only to find out if she’s okay.
If something unexpected happened, then she’ll respect you for taking the time to check up on her.
But if she texts back that everything is fine and she was just busy, then it becomes more evident that she’s losing some interest and you need to back off.
When you back away, she’ll start to pursue.
Wait until she texts you back, even if it takes an entire week. If you double text, don’t pursue any further.
Let it sit and wait for her to reach out.
If there is still interest, she will definitely reach out. And if she was losing interest, this time away could have fixed any damage you could have caused from texting too much.
And when she texts you back, do not act crazy or angry.
Wait to hear why she hasn’t texted you back until now. You’ll be able to tell the difference between a real reason or a bollocks excuse.
Either way, shake it off and set up a meeting.
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