Just when you think that all your suffering and hard work to find a life partner have paid off, marriage problems arise and spin you like a top. The work never ends, but how you address problems early on dictates the course of your relationship. This is where people mess up, and their lack of preparation leads to disaster. Today’s article is going to break down the list of reasons why marriages fail so that you can take cautionary action to prevent it from happening to you.
What Causes Marriages To Fall Apart?
1. Poor Communication
One of the leading causes of marital problems is a breakdown of communication. Couples who fail to communicate respectfully also struggle to effectively communicate their changing needs, feelings, and concerns to each other. Failing to do so creates a gap between couples that grows larger and larger over time until they are no longer closely connected despite living under the same roof. The worst thing a couple can do is use the silent treatment on each other frequently.
2. Lack Of Trust
At the very core of every long-lasting marriage is trust. It is the string that ties people together, and when severed, the marriage fails and implodes. Trust breaks down due to dishonesty, infidelity, breaches of confidence, and disrespect. Once damaged or broken, it is almost impossible to restore trust to what it used to be. That’s when suspicion, paranoia, and criticism set in, gradually infecting the marriage until it’s just a skeleton of what it used to be.
3. Financial Issues
You would think that love conquers all, and in many ways, it does. But the stress of being financially stable in an unstable economy creates incredible pressure on couples who are not well-off. Similarly, poor spending habits and distrust among partners over financial earnings can lead to unnecessary problems and arguments that escalate into larger issues. Frequent disagreements and pressure without the presence of joy, banter, fun, and happiness drive people apart and prevent love from being as potent as it normally would be.
4. Unresolved Conflicts
To harbor resentment and frustration towards your spouse is a surefire way to create distance and disconnection. Sadly, far too many couples sweep their problems or unresolved conflicts under the rug. Just because it isn’t visible doesn’t mean that it isn’t destroying the very foundation of a relationship. Over time, these unresolved issues build up and stack up until there’s not much left except anger, resentment, distrust, and frustration. Even if a couple wants to work things out, they’re too overwhelmed by their issues and poor feelings to survive the journey, at least not without help.
5. Emotional Disconnect
Love has to be nurtured, and the best way to keep the spark alive is to court each other the way you did during the early days of falling in love. This means that married couples ought to go on dates, share interests, and remain intimate with each other on a regular basis. Couples who fall into complacency and also fail to court each other usually disconnect emotionally. It’s difficult to reconnect if you don’t have the tools, willingness, attitude, and mindset to approach each other with the mutual goal of cultivating love and romance again. Also, pride and ego are another reason why people fall out of love and stay out of love.
6. Incompatibility
Some people change too much after marriage, while others remain the same. The issue is created when couples grow apart. When this occurs, it’s possible that fundamental differences in values, lifestyle, and goals appear, which leads to incompatibility and dissatisfaction in the relationship. Eventually, incompatibilities trigger persistent arguments and dissatisfaction, causing couples to separate and divorce. Those couples who prioritize goal-setting with each other often have an easier time remaining compatible and connected.
7. External Stressors
External factors such as work stress, health problems, family issues, or other life challenges can put strain on a marriage and make it difficult for couples to maintain a healthy relationship. Couples who do not place a strong emphasis on building skills that unite them as a team often fall apart when faced with ongoing external stressors. Not being able to leave problems at the doorway when returning home to each other will ruin crucial moments of intimacy, spontaneity, and joy.
8. Lack Of Commitment
Marriage is the culmination of commitment. It isn’t just about exclusivity or fidelity, but a commitment to show up and be of service to the relationship day in and day out. This requires an investment of time, effort, love, and attention on a regular basis, but if couples fail to show up, it becomes one of the many reasons why marriages fail. Every single time a spouse makes a promise and fails to honor that commitment, it causes the other spouse to feel distrust, dissatisfaction, and resentment. Those feelings don’t just disappear, and they certainly do not benefit the marriage at all.
9. Unrealistic Expectations
Unrealistic expectations about marriage, such as expecting your partner to fulfill all your needs and desires or believing that marriage will solve all problems, can lead to disappointment and dissatisfaction. When reality doesn’t meet these expectations, it’s possible that people begin to feel disillusioned, and that casts a strong shadow of doubt over the relationship.
10. Addiction Or Substance Abuse
One of the worst reasons why marriages fail is substance abuse. People with addictions become extremely unreliable, manipulative, problematic, and stressful. Without professional help, the marriage has little chance to succeed because one or both spouses are a train wreck.
11. Lack Of Support
Life can be difficult, but with the support of loved ones, people are capable of overcoming many obstacles. However, when you have loved ones who are unsupportive and absent during your times of need, it leads to extreme feelings of loneliness and abandonment. Love can’t thrive in an unsafe environment, and that is what people create when they fail to be supportive of each other.
Related articles:
120 Questions to ask before getting married
8 Benefits of marriage for a man
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