At some point or another, we’ve all had to say goodbye to someone we cared about. It’s just the nature of life and relationships. Perhaps, you reached a point where you had to end contact, or he chose to end contact with you. The question on your mind is probably this: Is he thinking about me even though we don’t talk?
Yes, if the two of you shared a close connection at one point and he isn’t with someone else, he will still think about you even though you don’t talk. In truth, there is an expiration date for how long someone will think about you if there was no relationship or shared experience between the two of you.
As a man, I can attest to this.
Despite the years that have passed, I still think about certain women I shared a close bond with, even though we don’t talk anymore.
Women with whom I didn’t share a strong bond aren’t people I think about, if at all.
Consider this for a second.
Have you forgotten about a single guy you truly loved or had a strong emotional connection with?
Have you forgotten a single guy who you shared memorable experiences with despite not talking for years?
We don’t forget those people who made a mark on our hearts, good or bad.
But, how often we think about them diminishes, and the emotional impact of those thoughts changes with time.
A guy may think about you, and it could cause him to feel all sorts of emotions that knock him out of balance.
Alternatively, he may think about you, and it could trigger no significant emotional charge within him.
If you’re hoping that he will miss you and come back, then it depends on how much he actually cared about you, if he feels lonely right now, and if he has any regrets about the way he treated you.
You need to read this article: What makes a man obsessed with a woman?
Thinking About An Ex After Losing Contact
I’ll tell you about the time when I stopped thinking about a specific ex.
I cared for this woman deeply, but our relationship ended abruptly. We were together for a few years, and it was incredibly difficult to accept the end.
It took me a long time to stop thinking about her.
Such is the case when you’re in your twenties and beyond.
With age, love takes on a new meaning for you. Especially if you feel like you’re connecting with fewer and fewer people as time passes.
Ironically, I had been meeting a lot of new people after this breakup, more so than I ever had before.
Perhaps, this was the most “exciting” time of my life in terms of meeting new women and casually dating.
But, I was actually quite miserable because I kept thinking about my ex.
The women I met were great—not all of them, but some of them were.
Unfortunately, I felt like I had unfinished business with my ex. I didn’t have closure, but not because we didn’t talk, but because I didn’t take the time to actually grieve the end of that relationship.
I didn’t know what it truly felt like to be by myself.
The fear of missing my ex was so overwhelming that I tried to numb myself and distract myself by living a busy and chaotic life.
The more I tried to avoid thinking about my ex or forcefully moving on, the more I thought about her and the worse I felt.
Eventually, I gave up trying to avoid reality. I embraced the sucky phase of being alone and faced my thoughts and emotions.
Amazingly, the more time I spent by myself facing what I feared, the easier it got to move forward.
At first, it felt awful.
I was plagued with thoughts of her all the time. Not just thoughts of the past but thoughts of a future that was not meant to be.
She was on my mind all the time, especially due to the pedestal I placed her on by running away from reality for so long.
But, now that I’d faced it and let time work its magic, I began to think about her less and less.
Eventually, I met someone else, with whom I ended up falling in love.
As that relationship took shape, the thought of my ex completely left my mind.
I was too occupied making memories in the present and forming a picture of a new future in my mind.
What I’m trying to illustrate with this story is how we think about people.
Sometimes, our own behavior and circumstances remind us of people we once cared about.
Other times, we are too occupied to think about our past.
Then, we’re reminded of those people, and we think about them again. Perhaps, we end up single again or back in a place where we used to be, and those thoughts return.
Talking to my ex didn’t make me think about her.
It was her absence.
The fact that you don’t talk to him anymore may be the reason why he actually thinks about you.
If he’s single or lonely, he may think about you.
Even if you hurt him deeply, he probably still thinks about you.
You need to read this article: Once a guy loses interest can you get it back?
Should You Text Him?
Let’s leave hope aside and focus on that little voice in the back of your head. What is it telling you to do?
I know for a fact that whenever I consider texting my last ex, that little voice in my head reminds me of reality.
Texting my ex would do nothing but make life harder for her and for myself.
Unless you have the intention to work through past issues or to try again, don’t text him.
Give him the space and time he needs to move on and live his life, as you deserve to as well.
Every time I think about my last ex, whom I was going to marry, I consider reaching out to her, but I know that it wouldn’t change anything. It would be selfish of me to show up in her life if it would amount to nothing but prolonged sorrow or a reminder of what has passed, especially for her.
So, I don’t do it.
Similarly, if you are on the receiving end of a breakup or rejection, don’t put yourself in the position to restart the healing process all over again by texting him.
If he really wanted to come back, he would.
And you know what? It’s more likely that your silence will bring him back than anything you decide to text him.
Unless, of course, he only left because you were cold and unloving toward him. In that case, showing some effort could have a positive effect.
But, I’m pretty sure that expressing love or kindness wasn’t the issue in your case.
So, no, you should not text him.
You need to read this article: Does absence make your ex miss you?
Whenever I find myself overcome with emotion over the people who are no longer in my life, romantically speaking, I remind myself that there’s a greater plan at work.
We aren’t meant to keep everyone who crosses paths with us, even if we love them dearly.
But, those who are meant to remain in our lives will find their way to us, and they’ll stay. If they do leave, it will often be temporary.
The next time you doubt whether someone thinks about you after ending contact, remember that you are far too memorable to forget, especially if you shared a genuine connection with that person.
That brings us to the conclusion of this article on whether he is thinking about you even though you don’t talk anymore. If you’d like to work with me through a situation like this, check out my services page for more information on how to get in contact with me.