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10 Ideas For Self-Care After A Breakup

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how to take care of yourself after a breakup, self-care after being dumped

The difference between those who win at life and those who don’t is how they show up during times of suffering. I truly believe that anyone is capable of growth and tremendous success as long as they are willing to take care of themselves and exert a genuine effort during bad days. A breakup definitely constitutes a bad day. It will wreck you in ways that you least expect unless you take care of yourself. This article contains all my favorite ideas for self-care after a breakup.

Self-care has gotten an unfair reputation over the last couple of years. People associate it with being overly emotional and soft. But in reality, self-care means doing what is necessary for your wellbeing.

What becomes necessary during times of hardship will vary from person to person. Some people need to spend that time soothing themselves with meditation and good food, while others need to work harder and challenge themselves physically, mentally, or spiritually.

Look within yourself, examine your life during this phase, and answer the following questions:

  • What should you do to become stronger, smarter, kinder, and wiser after this breakup?
  • Is it a season for you to slow down or to speed up?
  • Should you be spending more time in solitude to redefine your identity, or should you be investing love and time in the people who matter to you? Should you be doing both but at different times?

That’s something only you can answer, because this is your journey toward self-care.

Be that as it may, I have been through my fair share of breakups, and I’ve also helped people heal from getting their hearts broken.

I know a thing or two about self-care and emotional recovery, which is why I want to share some of my favorite ideas on taking care of yourself after a breakup.

Related article: How to get closure after a breakup

Tips For Self-Care After Breaking Up

ideas for self-care after a breakup

1. Learn and Grow

Reading books and watching self-development videos are great coping mechanisms after a loss.

I’ve done it before, and they provided me with hope and empowerment. But, ultimately, the greatest way to deal with a breakup is to give meaning to it. We suffer more when we are unable to see a reason for what we are going through.

By attaching life lessons to breakups, we create a reason for our suffering, and that allows us to cope with it fairly well.

What have you learned from this relationship or breakup, and how can you use it to grow as a person and partner?

Related article: Hurt by someone you love? 8 Ways to heal

2. Avoid Catastrophizing

I used to be a huge catastrophizer in the past, but it achieved nothing except stressing me out more because it is the practice of anticipating the worst possible outcomes. I don’t indulge in that behavior by affirming positive and empowering ideas.

For example, this is something that I say repeatedly every single day: “Life happens for me, not to me.”

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Our body is objective. It absorbs whatever we say to it without taking context into consideration. Thinking and voicing negative possibilities or thoughts only trigger stress and a negative response in our bodies.

The exact opposite is true as well.

So whenever you find yourself on the cusp of catastrophizing, repeatedly enforce an affirmation that makes you feel hopeful and empowered.

3. Nourish Your Body

Pay attention to your physical health by maintaining a balanced diet, staying hydrated, and getting regular exercise.

It is also true that physical activity can release endorphins, the body’s natural mood enhancers, helping to alleviate depression and boost your mental health. I like to eat clean and workout every single day.

At the same time, nourishment also includes providing your body with what it craves.

In a controllable amount and manner, I also indulge in something sweet or savory without guilt or regret.

4. Establish Healthy Boundaries

It is instrumental that you establish clear and healthy boundaries with your ex, both emotionally and physically.

When you are vulnerable and volatile, contact with your ex needs to be limited and designed in a way that doesn’t interfere with your process of healing and moving on.

Decide on what that looks like for you, and then enforce those boundaries respectfully.

Some ex’s will take you on a rollercoaster ride of emotions with them until they are ready to move on.

Don’t indulge in that experience; it will prolong your journey unnecessarily.

Related article: 17 Signs your ex is taking advantage of you

5. Connect with Supportive Friends

If you are the type of person who isolates, I suggest reaching out to supportive friends because long-term isolation without a healthy mindset is not conducive to healing.

Conversely, if you spend too much time with friends, either be selective about who you allow into your life at this time or balance socializing with time in solitude.

Supportive friends are those who are honest with you but caring.

They may hold you accountable, but in a respectful manner.

You need friends who will tell you like it is, especially when you are in the mood to self-sabotage your healing journey.

6. Pamper Yourself

Self-indulge from time to time.

Whether it’s a spa day, a favorite meal, or a weekend getaway with friends and family, pampering yourself can boost your self-esteem and provide a much-needed break from the challenges of the healing process. Who says that you have to be sad and depressed all day?

There’s nothing wrong with choosing to ignore whatever is upsetting you for an hour or two and enjoy life.

That’s what I tell myself, and it works.

7. Cultivate Hobbies and Interests

From my observation, the healthiest and happiest people are those who have many interests in life.

Rediscover activities you enjoy or explore new hobbies that bring you joy.

Whether it’s painting, hiking, or learning a musical instrument, engaging in activities that you’re passionate about can be a therapeutic way to redirect your focus and burn out some of those negative emotions.

Make a list of 100 things to do, be, or become, and use it as a navigational tool to occupy your mind and cultivate a life of abundance beyond romantic love.

Related article: 10 Ways to rebuild self-confidence after a breakup

8. Practice Mindfulness and Meditation

When depressed, breathwork and mindfulness can help energize you and stimulate a sense of gratitude for life.

When anxious, meditation and slow breathing can calm you down.

They’re not easy to do, but small bouts of mindfulness and meditation on a daily basis can center you over time.

Apps like Headspace or Calm offer guided sessions suitable for beginners.

9. Pray

I love prayer. In my eyes, nothing is more self-caring and therapeutic than praying to God and surrendering to his plan.

Just the idea of God having a plan for my life provides comfort and meaning to my suffering. Set aside time every single day to pray to God.

Let him know how you feel, what you want, and how grateful you are for every blessing you have.

When grateful, it’s very difficult to be negative or pessimistic.

10. Plan For The Future

One of the more painful aspects of a breakup is the death of a future that could have been. You’ll grieve that future, and it’s okay to feel that way.

But loss is a part of our lives, and we must always be willing to plan for a future beyond our losses.

Sit down with a piece of paper and meditate on a new future that makes you feel empowered, hopeful, excited, and happy.

Write down that future vision in detail and refer to it on a daily basis, especially when you feel upset over the breakup.

That brings us to the end of this article on ideas for self-care after a breakup. I really hope that it helps comfort you and, most importantly, helps you heal and move on to a better future. As always, if you enjoyed this article, please share your thoughts with me in the comment section below.

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