Navigating relationship and courtship problems aren’t necessarily easy. Sometimes, you may find that a guy isn’t putting as much effort into communicating with you despite him saying he likes you. If you’ve been waiting for him to text you back and he takes many days to do so, this is how to respond when he finally texts you back.
Don’t respond immediately and make him wait. The reason for doing this is to teach him a lesson about being punctual and respecting your boundaries. Alternatively, let him know that you would prefer if he texts you back more punctually because you’re not willing to be with someone who can’t make time for you.
This is very important for you to do because it sets a precedent for what is acceptable or unacceptable behavior.
If you just fall back into texting him and being your loving self or showering him with attention, he’s going to subconsciously or consciously feel that it’s okay for him to leave you hanging and waiting for a text indefinitely.
That’s why I highly encourage you to set aside all feelings and just express your boundaries in this situation.
Apart from making it known that you are not willing to deal with a flakey person, you’re also showing a great deal of self-respect.
And if there’s one thing I know, men gravitate more towards women who respect themselves.
The logic behind this is simple – Don’t reward bad behavior.
If you allow him to just do what he wants without any ramifications, it’s going to encourage that behavior and also devalue your worth.
A healthy relationship is built on the premise that two people choose to be together. They want to talk to each other, be with each other, love each other and support each other.
How are you going to enjoy all of that if he can’t even text you back punctually and you allow him to get away with it?
People will only continue to do things to you if you allow them to.
By setting the record straight, you’re creating an opportunity for him to not only show up and make more of an effort but to also respect you.
let’s get into some finer details and tips on how to respond when he finally texts you back.
1. Don’t text him back immediately
I’m not a petty person at all but if someone is doing something to you that isn’t fair and they’re not listening to reason, then you may need to give them a taste of their own medicine.
I’m not saying that you should stoop down to that level but you should hold back and wait.
Don’t give him the satisfaction of knowing that you were waiting for his text with bated breath.
Let him wait a few hours or a day before you get back to him.
This will show him that you’re not desperate for him nor are you going to sit around waiting for him to text you back days or weeks later.
But, if he didn’t make you wait that long, just hold off texting him back for a few hours and then proceed to reply to him.
Related post: Should I text him or wait?
2. Don’t pick up where you left off
Even though I’m telling you that it’s not a good idea to let him think that you were waiting for him to text you back, I’m sure that you were, at least to some extent or else you wouldn’t be here reading this article.
There’s nothing wrong with the fact that you were hoping and waiting for him to text you back.
It just tells me that you care about him and want to communicate.
But, he just displayed behavior that isn’t matching your level of interest and desire.
Don’t reward him for that behavior and just fall back into being attentive, loving and excited to talk to him without making him wait and setting the record straight.
He needs to know that there are some consequences for not making a fair effort or else he’ll take you for granted in the future.
Related post: What does it mean if he hasn’t contacted you in months?
3. Tell him that you’d prefer if he texted you more promptly
When you do reply to him, it’s important that you make it clear that you’re not pleased with the fact that he made you wait for a text back.
Granted, people get busy and sometimes it takes a couple of hours to get back to someone, even if you’re in a relationship.
That’s understandable and okay.
Heck, even if he didn’t text you for a day, there are instances when there is a valid reason for why he didn’t and couldn’t.
Here’s the thing, if there was a reason, he’d tell you the minute he texts you back or very soon after.
And based on his explanation, you’ll know how to handle it.
If he had a loss in the family or some form of problem that justified him not texting you back for a bit, then you can skip all of these things.
But, if his excuse was that he’s busy or something, then you need to let him know that this won’t work for you.
If he’s going to be incredibly busy, then he should at least shoot you a text that he’s busy and will reply soon.
It’s common courtesy, especially when you’re trying to develop a relationship with someone.
Related post: Why isn’t he texting me?
4. Don’t argue with him or lash out
As much as I want you to take him to task and let him know that not making an effort to text you back isn’t working for you, I do not encourage you to argue or lash out at him.
Just remember, you’re not trying to punish him or force him to spend time with you.
You’re simply setting the standard for what is acceptable and unacceptable behavior.
Do this with grace or else you risk pushing him away and making yourself look a bit desperate or immature.
You’re a woman of value and there’s no need for you to fight with someone for them to be with you.
For that reason, it’s best to handle this with grace and maturity.
Be kind with your words and avoid berating him.
Just state how you feel and what you need from him.
Once he acknowledges that, continue being polite and rekindling the romance with him.
If he doesn’t acknowledge your needs and is actually brazen about it, then don’t waste your time texting him back afterward.
A guy who genuinely cares about you and likes you will respect the fact that this is simply coming from a place of wanting to talk to him more.
Related post: My boyfriend reads but doesn’t reply to my texts
To summarize how to respond when he finally texts you back – Don’t respond immediately and make him wait. The reason for doing this is to teach him a lesson about being punctual and respecting your boundaries. Alternatively, let him know that you would prefer if he texts you back more punctually because you’re not willing to be with someone who can’t make time for you.
If he has a really valid reason for not texting you in a few days like a loss in the family or some kind of personal emergency, then you can skip this because it shows that this was a one-time issue that is more than justifiable.
If he was just busy or gave some kind of lackadaisical response for why he hasn’t texted you back for so long, then make sure you do as I say and call him out on it.
What you don’t want to do is fight with him or lash out because it will only push him away and risk making you look crazy or too extreme.
Handle it with maturity and class so that you don’t end up feeling like you behaved poorly in any way.
With that being said, I hope you found this article on how to respond when he finally texts you back to be insightful and helpful. If you would like to share your questions or thoughts with me, please do so by visiting the comment section below.
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