How To Get Rid Of A Toxic Best Friend (8 Steps That Work)


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A toxic best friend can ruin your life. It sounds outlandish but we don’t realize just how much influence the closest people in our lives have on our decisions and overall well being. Perhaps you’re in this situation now and you’re trying to figure out how to get rid of your toxic best friend.

I’ve laid out 8 steps on how to get rid of them without creating a big scene or bad blood.

What I can tell you, with certainty, is that you’re making the right decision to prioritize your well being and happiness.

Even if that means cutting out someone who you’ve known for a long time. If they bring nothing but unhappiness into your life, it’s high time that you get rid of them.

With that being said, let’s get into this article on how to get rid of your toxic best friend.

Related post: 10 signs your friend doesn’t care about you

Step 1: Set Boundaries

You’d be surprised at how many people will leave your life when you stop putting up with their toxic behavior by setting boundaries.

What I’ve come to realize is that if you constantly allow someone to treat you poorly, they’ll continue to do so unless they have some kind of self-altering even in their life.

Otherwise, it will be a repeat of the same toxic behavior for an indefinite period of time.

By no means am I advocating the idea of not being tolerant.

Part of all friendships and relationships is to compromise, be forgiving and to be open to giving people chances.

But, you must first establish some ground rules. If someone breaks those rules, let them know that they’ve crossed a line and that you are not okay with it. If they sincerely apologize, forgive and move on.

If they do it again, you can repeat the same steps above.

However, if someone continues to do it and their apology becomes nothing more than empty words, it may be time to take harsher measures and cut them off.

This will let your best friend know that you are not willing to be treated shabbily and it will remind them that you are being serious.

If they genuinely care about you, they’ll come back and change their toxic behavior.

Step 2: Find Better Quality Friends

I know, I know, easier said than done. But, immersing yourself in the kind of activities you enjoy will place you in a favorable position to meet people who gel with you.

Start by setting standards for the kind of people you want in your life.

Make a list of all the toxic traits you want to avoid in a friend and try to use that as a guiding tool in making better friends.

By doing so, you’ll find yourself focusing more on the kind of friends who are good for you instead of those who are bad and toxic. 

Step 3: Stop Texting Your Toxic Best Friend Often

Some people tend to prefer a slow fade and one of the ways to accomplish this would be to test your toxic best friend less often.  

You could start by taking longer to reply, then keep your replies short before eventually not replying at all.

Be warned though, your toxic best friend could get very annoyed at you and lash out for your lack of effort at texting.

But, if this is what you’re looking to do, I suppose that it’s a small price to pay. 

Related post: Is it immature to ignore your ex?

Step 4: Don’t Settle For Toxic Behavior

Some people don’t like to be taken to task or called out for their toxic behavior and when they are, instead of addressing the issue, they would rather walk away or end relationships.

This is definitely an effective tip on how to get rid of a toxic best friend.

They will choose to either break friendship and walk away or to behave differently.

Either way, it’s a win-win situation for you. 

Step 5: Focus On Those Who Make You Happy

The more you focus on those who make you happy, the less time you’ll spend around someone who is toxic. 

It’s easy for me to tell you to just stop talking or to break ties with your toxic best friend but there is probably a lot of history, sentimentality and experiences that keep you tied to them.

You have to be ready for the reality that the friendship needs to end and once it does, it could be forever.

Additionally, it may not happen on the best terms or without bad blood. 

Prepare for this possibility by reminding yourself of what you have to gain – good friends. 

Step 6: Don’t Contact Them When You Become Sentimental

If you decide to cut someone off, it’s best not to reach out only to do it again because that would make you a toxic friend as well.

Walking away from someone is difficult, even if they weren’t the best of people.

You’ll definitely find yourself feeling nostalgic or sentimental and that can often lead you to reach out.

But, I would suggest waiting until you’re certain about what you want.

This will prevent you from reintroducing a friend back into your life when you’re not prepared to deal with them again.

Step 7: Be Upfront And Honest

Sometimes, the best approach is a direct and honest approach. This may even be more preferable to a slow fade because it provides a sense of closure for you and your best friend.

I would advise you to avoid getting into an argument. You don’t have to fight or argue to prove a point. 

Explain how you feel and wish them well. You can’t control how they may react but you can certainly control the way you react.

Don’t allow it to become uglier by turning into a pissing contest. It will create too much bad blood between the two of you and that is not a healthy way of ending a friendship. 

Step 8: Don’t Get Into An Argument Over It

Let’s say that you distance yourself from your toxic best friend or decide to confront them about parting ways and it turns ugly.

The last thing you want to do is stoop down to your toxic best friends level because then that means you’re no different and really have no right for criticizing them for their behavior.

It is far better to maintain your composure and be polite the entire time, even if your best friend acts like a douche.

When you walk away from that interaction, you’ll have some closure and you won’t regret losing your cool.

You can sleep easy at night knowing that you did what was right for you without resorting to childish, immature or toxic behavior.

In Conclusion

By no stretch of the imagination is it easy to just get rid of a toxic best friend but if your well being and happiness is at stake, you will do it.

And that’s what you really have to focus on when trying to do this.

It will be hard but once it’s done and enough time has passed, you’ll be in a great position to start fresh without having someone who hurts, offends and insults you.

With that being said, I hope this article on how to get rid of your toxic best friend was helpful to you. Feel free to share your thoughts or questions in the comment section below.

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