I know exactly how to get a girl back but it’s going to be more difficult than you expect.
That’s the truth.
There’s no magic trick or special secret seduction technique that’s going to bring back your lost lover overnight.
On the contrary, the techniques below will take time. But, they work. And they work better than most of what you find online.
Whether you have blown it with a girl, screwed up big time or got dumped without any warning whatsoever, the advice below applies to you.
I remember a time when I was blatantly rejected by a girl who I liked quite a lot. I was doing everything wrong and taking too long to make a move. I’m talking months of wasted opportunity. She got fed up and frustrated with me.
It took me about a month to get her back and at that time, I learned the importance of patience, gradual improvement and the art of being more mysterious.
Fast forward many years and I had been dumped by a girl I was in a relationship with for about 4 years.
I did everything you shouldn’t do. From trying to chase her to using logic and reasoning to win her back.
In the end, all it did was drive her further away and paint me out to be a desperate, needy, clingy and crazy ex-boyfriend. Thankfully, I was able to readjust my approach, stop thinking about her as much and undid some of that damage.
Eventually, she reached out again and we got close but too much time had passed and too much had happened for us to be together. What was more surprising is how my dating life exploded during that time.
I had never had as much success with women as I did after that breakup.
Much of that can even be attributed to the techniques on how to get a girl back which are featured below.
Like anything in life, you must be committed and disciplined in order to get good results.
Expect to face intense emotional resistance. If you can stay the course, you will most likely get her back or get over her once and for all.
Here’s my top 10 tips on how to get a girl back.
1. Don’t chase her
Most of the time, when a guy blows it with a girl, he is left feeling defeated and desperate to win her back. Been there and done that. It doesn’t work if you chase after her.
If anything, space and time away from you will help her in getting over any negative emotions she felt towards you or the damage done from doing all the wrong things.
By the time you do interact again, she may be more receptive and easier to get back. I want to emphasize one more time if you want to master the art of how to get a girl back, learn the art of patience.
Do not chase her!
It will only make you look desperate, weak and annoying.
2. Give her the space to initiate contact
While we’re on the topic of not chasing her, when you give a woman some space, not only does it give her the chance to get over the thing you did that upset her but it also gives her the opportunity to miss you.
When she reaches out, that’s when you know with certainty that your chances are not doomed and you can possibly salvage the situation.
I understand how difficult it is to maintain your calmness. Every atom in your body is probably screaming at you to do something. But, that may not help your cast at all.
Inaction and indifference can be an effective tool in rebuilding attraction. Use it appropriately, especially when you’ve been rejected or dumped.
3. Avoid bringing up unhealthy conversations
Going on and on about something bad that happened or disagreements do nothing but keep you both tied to the past. It creates feelings of resentment and annoyance.
As a rule of thumb, when you have the opportunity to get a girl back, focus on taking her towards a newer and better dynamic rather than what you had before.
By focusing on the present moment, you can have a good time and remind her of all the reasons why you’re an amazing guy.
When trying to get a girl back, the last thing you want to do is remind her of all the reasons why she disqualified or dumped you in the first place.
4. Don’t attack her feelings or thoughts
Sometimes, women have a hard time moving past an incident without hashing it out. It’s not about reliving the issue.
They don’t even expect you to defend yourself again.
What they actually want is for you to just listen, sympathize and understand their point of view.
If you can show her that you truly give a damn about how your actions affected her, she’ll let down her guard and be more receptive to making up.
What you don’t want to do is attack her or make her feel like she’s being ridiculous for how she’s feeling.
Even if you believe that she has overreacted, don’t judge her for it.
5. Listen to what she’s saying
Believe it or not, women who actually like you a lot will help you do things correctly.
They’ll give you ample opportunities to make a move or connect with them.
But, if you’re not paying attention or you’re too caught up in your obsession for getting her back, it may fly over your head.
Instead, ground yourself in the present moment, forget about your desire and listen to her.
Pay attention to more than what she says. Look at her body language, her facial expressions and overall demeanor.
These subtle clues will drastically help you in redirecting the relationship to a healthier and happier place.
6. Be romantic
You win a girl back not just through words but through actions. Igniting feelings of attraction and love can best be done by treating her like someone special.
Let small gestures be a reminder of your manliness and kind heart.
It’s not just the action but the sentiment behind it. If you really want to show her that you are genuine about your feelings, let your actions speak for you.
7. Focus on having fun and making her laugh
Love and affection thrive within feelings of happiness. And as they say, if you can make a girl laugh, you’ve won half the battle.
The best way to undo damage to a relationship is to overwrite those experiences with good and fond memories.
As such, being jovial, funny and spontaneous can reinvigorate the relationship by giving her new memories and experiences to reflect on.
For a list of fun date ideas, check out our collection.
8. Be patient when it comes to exclusivity
This was something I struggled with for a long time because I’m the type of person who won’t rest until I fix or accomplish something I set my heart and mind on.
But, just because you are experiencing feelings of desire and you’re ready to be together again doesn’t mean she will feel the same way. You must be prepared to wait and be patient.
There’s really no accurate predictor for how long it may take you to get her back.
If you go into it with an impatient mindset, chances are such that you may act desperately, erratically and forcefully which will only drive her further away.
9. Initiate no contact
If you have been dumped or rejected, the best thing you could possibly do to move on and improve your chances of getting her back is to initiate no contact.
Without a doubt, no contact works.
It is effective for both men and women. No contact requires you to eliminate all forms of contact with her for an indefinite period of time. Essentially, it attaches real-life consequences to her decision.
By going no contact, you speed up the process of getting over her but it also prevents you from chasing her and embarrassing yourself.
Eventually, when she starts missing you, feeling lonely or gets rejected by someone else, she’ll want to reach out.
And because you initiated no contact, you avoided falling into the dreadful friend zone which most guys end up in after losing a girl.
10. Improve yourself
As we know by now, actions speak louder than words.
If your girl left or rejected you due to behavior that was off-putting or toxic, this is your chance to improve.
By removing the reason for splitting up, there’s really no reason why you can’t get her back.
Apart from that, self-improvement is the best investment you could make. It will always pay back more than what you put in.
There’s never any loss you could incur from improving yourself. Self-improvement doesn’t just make you feel better or show your ex that you’re better than before, it makes you a higher valued bachelor.
This means that you can thrive in other areas of your life AND attract higher quality women.
Make a list of 100 things to do, be or become.
It may take you a couple of hours and you may need to stretch your imagination to reach a 100. But, do it and allow this list to guide you.
Make sure the items on your list are actionable. I promise you, by the time you’re done with this list, you’ll find a ton of things to do, be or become that make you happy and make you the best version of yourself.
What to do when she comes back to you
If you’ve been doing enough things right and it positively affected her to the point of coming back, now is your opportunity to strike while the iron is hot.
What you want to do is display how amazing it is to be around you and the type of man you’ve become.
The best way of doing this is by taking her out on a few fun dates and making the move on her.
Think of it as courting her all over again. Do everything one would normally do to build attraction.
And depending on the circumstances, intimacy of any nature plays a huge role in getting her back. When you get through those barriers and finally connect with her on a deeper level, feelings of warmth, love and care are bound to manifest again.
What can you do if she doesn’t come back?
Go on with your life. Trust me, putting life on hold until you get someone back is a huge mistake.
You can’t guarantee that someone will come back. Even if you do every single thing the right way, she may still not come back to you.
If you can prepare yourself for that possibility, it would save you from a lot of disappointment and regret.
I made the mistake of putting my life on hold after getting dumped years ago. And one of my biggest regrets is allowing myself to do nothing in that time but pine for my ex.
If I could turn back the clock, I would smack myself across the face and insist that I live life as if there were no guarantee I’d be alive the next day.
For more information on how to forget someone and move on, please read this elaborate guide.
With that being said, I hope you enjoyed this article on how to get a girl back. Please share your experiences and tips in the comment section below.
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