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How To Act Around Your Ex Who Dumped You (10 Tips)

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ways to act around your ex, how to behave around an ex who dumped you

If you think getting dumped is difficult to handle, imagine having to see your ex who dumped you all the time. Imagine having to work with that ex or coparent with them. It could be a nightmare for you. Not only are you grappling with the uncomfortable feelings that come with being dumped, but you probably still hold a torch for your ex. This article is going to focus on how to act around your ex who dumped you.

One of the main reasons why so many people struggle to re-attract their ex, who is in close proximity to them, is due to their own behavior.

Overthinking, desperation, rumination, anxiety, fear, desire, and love are just some of the many things you experience around your ex who dumped you. 

Furthermore, when you are emotionally flared up, it’s difficult to act in accordance with your true identity, especially if your struggles expand to feelings of incompetency or inadequacy after being rejected.

I’ve been in this situation before, as many of us have. 

You learn a lot about yourself and interpersonal dynamics through trial and error.

To help you behave in an attractive and powerful manner, I want to share some of the lessons I learned on how to act around your ex who dumped you.

10 Tips On How To Behave Around An Ex

how to act around your ex who dumped you

1. Keep your distance

Prevention is better than cure. If you are unable to manage your emotions around him or her, it’s best to keep your distance. 

Try to keep most of your interactions with them short and sweet. Don’t get into any lengthy discussions, and don’t try to be their friend. 

You don’t have to go out of your way to avoid your ex, because that will come across as awkward and weird. But, don’t gravitate towards them either, even if you feel a strong desire to do so. 

Until you have gained more emotional self control, it’s best to remain cordial but distant. 

You need to read this article: 7 Reasons why you need to spend time alone

2. Be respectful and polite

Very few people are able to break up in a cordial and respectful manner. 

No matter how thoughtful or kind your ex tried to be when dumping you, their actions are inevitably going to create painful emotions. 

If you would like a step-by-step explanation on how to get an ex back or to re-attract someone who lost interest, grab a copy of my ebook called Reconcile. I put this guide together for serious students of the game who want to cut through the fluff and get results in their love life. Click Here To Check It Out! 

It can’t be avoided. 

The damage is always relative, depending on how they break up with you and their selection of words. 

Be that as it may, you should maintain your dignity and self-respect by not lashing out. 

Remain respectful and polite around your ex. 

Don’t make rude or snarky comments to them or about them to others. In fact, if you work with your ex, it is of great importance that you do not let personal feelings bleed into the workplace environment. 

The last thing you want is a call from HR over behavior that is deemed hostile or inappropriate for the workplace.

3. Maintain boundaries

The two of you are no longer together. Familiarity may encourage you to try and behave the way you used to with them. 

Perhaps they’re trying to do the same. 

But, that doesn’t mean you should. 

Now that the relationship has ended, it is important to set and maintain new boundaries. 

You don’t have to know about each other’s personal lives anymore. You don’t have to hang out with them, or vice versa. 

Expressing a need for space can be done in a kind and respectful manner without fostering feelings of resentment or bitterness.

4. Avoid talking about the breakup

In the event that you want to re-attract your ex, talking about the breakup will only evoke more feelings of sadness, disappointment, guilt, and awkwardness. 

You’re better off talking about good memories from the relationship than the breakup itself. Remember, most people who end a relationship experience something called “dumper’s remorse.” 

The dumper feels bad about hurting the dumpee and tries to make them feel better. But, it doesn’t really amount to a strong and loving desire to reconcile. 

Also, most ex’s tend to disagree and battle each other when talking about the breakup, especially when the wounds have not healed. It’s a topic best left for a time when both of you are able to communicate without getting emotionally riled up.

You need to read this article: What to do when your ex ignores your messages

5. Focus on yourself

Even though this article is about how to act around your ex who dumped you, it’s important to refocus your attention on yourself. Live life as if you are the narrator of your own story. 

Your story is not about your ex. So, your focus should primarily be on how you want to act and what you want to do to live the best life you can. 

Dwelling on your ex or the past isn’t productive or useful. Focus on what you need to do to heal, move on, and be happy. 

This story is not about your ex or your relationship. It’s all about you.

You need to read this article: How to improve yourself during no contact with your ex

6. Take time to process your emotions

Far too many people read articles about getting their ex back and then proceed to act as if everything is fine and dandy. 

Your ex can see through this charade, and so can most people. In this way, the only person you’re trying to fool is yourself, and the way you act will not translate to others in the same way you think because you’re not being authentic. 

Take this time to be present with your emotions. The best way to process emotions is to observe them without judgment. 

Rather than making declarations of undying love to your ex, fighting with them, or begging them to take you back whenever those feelings of loss arise, just let them pass through you.

Stop, focus on your breathing, experience the emotions, observe the way it rises and falls, and then return to what you were doing. Do all of this without bothering to engage with your ex. 

This is how you gain control over your emotions – not by choosing what you feel but by choosing how you act despite what you feel.

7. Don’t force a friendship

Let’s be honest, you don’t actually want to be friends with your ex. 

And the only reason your ex wants to be friends with you is so that they can reduce their guilt about dumping you while also experiencing the comfort of your presence and attention while they focus on moving on from you. 

It’s a lose-lose situation for you. Unless you genuinely have no desire to reconcile with your ex and they are a positive influence in your life, then you could try to be friends. 

But, even then, you should take some time to be apart before initiating a friendship again. 

You need to read this article: Does absence make your ex miss you

8. Avoid long conversations

There’s a great deal to be said for someone who can be civil and polite to an ex who dumped them. It shows character and strength. It’s also an opportunity to display your confidence despite being dumped. 

But, at the same time, the risk of something going wrong is too high. 

In fact, rather than healing, longer conversations with your ex may just remind you of how much you adore them. 

That isn’t going to help you move on at all. In some cases, it may even cause excessive feelings of anxiety and depression. 

Believe me when I tell you that there’s no obligation on your part to respond to every text or call from your ex. 

9. Be mindful of your body language

Our body language and facial expressions say more about our feelings than the words that escape our lips. 

Around your ex, you want to remain relaxed with an open posture. I’m sure that you feel defensive around your ex. 

They dumped you. 

This has obviously wounded your heart. In a way, your heart or subconscious mind wants to protect you from this person, even though you care about them. 

This is probably why your body would want to take on a defensive stance by crossing your arms, frowning, shelling up, or appearing afraid. 

Try your best to calm down and relax around them, at least physically.

10. Don’t try to make your ex jealous

If you think that dating someone else or flaunting another person in front of your ex is a mature and healthy way to deal with the breakup, then you’re mistaken. It may temporarily make your ex jealous, or it may drive them away forever.

Alternatively, it may create uncomfortable and awkward feelings for everyone involved. It’s also incredibly unfair to the new person in your life. 

They deserve to be celebrated for who they are and not used as pawns for jealousy. 

You’re risking their feelings in an attempt to play a childish game. 

Don’t do it.

Final Thoughts

My heart goes out to you during this difficult time in your life. I know just how painful it is to lose someone you love, even if it’s a breakup.

In reality, even though this article provides a good breakdown of how to act around your ex who dumped you, there’s no way to be perfect. 

Give yourself a break and be kind to yourself.

Even the strongest person in the world is prone to weak moments when faced with painful situations. 

Do the best that you can and focus on being compassionate with yourself.

With that being said, I hope you found this article to be helpful and a source of guidance. If you would like to get your ex back, I have a book called Reconcile that perfectly illustrates everything you need to do, from the breakup to the weeks that follow. Click here to check it out.

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