When you’re single and desperately hoping to find love but are constantly reminded of everyone else’s relationships, it’s difficult to remain indifferent. You may not want to feel envy, but it just rises within your chest at the sight of others. This begs the question, how do I stop envying other people’s relationships?
The best way to stop envying other people’s relationships is to design a life that makes you happy and that sets you on the path towards finding the ideal partner for you. Inspiring hope into your heart and a sense of guidance towards what or who you want is an effective way to stop envy in its tracks.
But, how do you do that?
It sounds easier said than done and it is. But, that’s what makes the journey worth it. By implementing the advice in this article, you will find yourself in more than one way.
Rather than envy, you will be grateful for what you have and excited for what lies ahead.
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Why Am I Envious Of Other People’s Relationships?
The main reason you are envious of other people’s relationships is because of comparison.
By comparing your life with others, you are creating reasons to feel inferior and behind.
And because relationships are a natural desire for most of us, a lack of romantic love can often make us feel like we are behind in life.
The more time you spend observing other people’s relationships from a place of envy and lack, the more envious and jealous you will feel.
It can turn into a never ending cycle.
Envy doesn’t get us what we want.
It’s a useless emotion if it can’t be channeled to inspire positive action towards improving your personal life.
Because you feel like there’s an emptiness in your life and you’re witnessing others enjoy what you want on a frequent basis, envy and jealousy accompany you more often.
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Ways To Stop Envying People’s Relationships
1. Don’t compare yourself to other people or their relationships
I’m a competitive person, and I’d be lying if I said that I don’t have the inclination to compare myself to others.
But, I quickly learned that this comparison is detrimental to mental and emotional wellbeing if left uncontrolled and unregulated.
The best person to compare yourself to is the previous version of yourself.
That’s it.
Nobody else.
You will always lose by comparing yourself to other people, because there will always be someone ahead of you in some way.
That’s life, and it’s none of your business what others do or have.
Our only focus should be on what we can do and who we are becoming.
Whether other people succeed or fail, it doesn’t really change our lives. That’s the truth. So, why be envious of other people’s relationships? It’s not going to change your love life.
You would much better be suited channeling your focus back onto yourself.
2. Work towards a better future
The harder I work toward becoming the best version of myself and creating the best life for myself and my loved ones, the easier it is to live without certain things in my life.
What diminishes envy, jealousy, anxiety, and fear is hard work.
You’re too busy to sit around comparing your life to other people.
You’re also too occupied in the pursuit of meaningful development to be swayed by what is missing in your life.
The constant reminder that you have some influence over what happens in your life and who you become is enough to shield your heart against nasty emotions like envy and jealousy.
When you work towards something, you begin to pile up reasons to believe that good things will happen for you.
More importantly, you create a reason to have hope.
Once hope is present, easy of mind and excitement for the future supersedes feelings of envy for other people’s relationships.
3. Trust in the process and plan God has for you
This is perhaps one of the most difficult things to do because uncertainty causes a great deal of anxiety and fear, but it’s also the best fix for envy and anxiety.
As much as we want to hold onto the idea that we have control over everything in our lives, some things are genuinely beyond our control.
We get to choose the way in which we act and the way we choose to perceive life.
That’s it.
Most of everything else is out of our control, and learning to accept that is an essential step towards inner peace and contentment.
Whenever I get stuck on the thought of what is missing from my life, I remind myself that I can only control what I do on a daily basis. Whatever or whoever is meant for me will show up when the time is right and when I have earned it.
When you truly surrender to a greater plan, it’s easier to learn how to stop envying other people’s relationships.
4. Create a life you love and respect
Nothing provides more peace and contentment than purpose.
Whenever I feel envious of other people’s relationships while I’m single, I can always trace it back to already feeling an emptiness within me.
Typically, emptiness is associated with a lack of purpose or a desire to live a disciplined but meaningful life.
When I change my behavior and dial into spirituality and service to those around me, envy isn’t an issue.
I feel happiness and admiration for other people’s relationships because I’m already in a state of wholeness.
Before pursuing a romantic relationship, you must be in a state of abundance. After all, love is giving. The whole purpose of being in a romantic relationship is to give love to someone.
Start by designing a life that fills you with an abundance of love, wisdom, compassion, amenities, and experiences, and then share that with someone who deserves it.
5. Eliminate social media for some time
It’s difficult to be envious or jealous of other people’s relationships when you are not exposed to an influx of them.
Comparison is the thief of joy, and unless envy inspires you to make positive changes in your life, it’s not the kind of emotion to entertain.
If it’s possible, reduce the amount of time you spend on social media.
It doesn’t even matter if you are aware that people are only sharing glamorized snapshots of their lives or relationships.
Your brain interprets it all the same.
Not only are you exposing yourself to other people’s relationships that trigger envy and jealousy in you, but the standard you’re setting for yourself is unrealistic.
This is why so many people are single, divorced, or perpetually unhappy in relationships. They’re living life through the lens of what they see online, and that is no way to live.
Disconnect for some time and allow yourself to experience the freedom of only viewing life through your own lens while focusing only on yourself and the closest people around you.
Ever since reducing my social media consumption, I have had an easier time dealing with envy or jealousy. There are times when I slip up, and the effects are most certainly felt, which is why I stand strongly against the use of unrestricted social media.
You’d be surprised at how peaceful it is to disconnect.
Also, the change in your wants and needs is surprising.
Once your standards readjust to what you really want versus what social media tells you to want, it becomes easier to meet and entertain the right people.
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6. Learn from people who are in healthy and happy relationships
Envy isn’t a problem when you adopt hope into your heart and look at other people’s successes as inspiration and blueprints for your own.
It’s all about changing your perspective and accepting that the journey of life is different for everyone.
You may not be ready to receive the kind of relationship you want or deserve right now.
So, why not look at those who are in happy relationships and learn about what they have done to build that kind of relationship.
Take motivation, inspiration, and wisdom from those who have what you desire.
It beats stewing in envy and bitterness.
Final Thoughts
Don’t be too hard on yourself for feeling envy.
It may be an emotion that causes you distress and sadness but it’s something that we all have the potential to experience.
Redirect your attention towards positive things in life that are within your control.
By becoming the best version of yourself and accepting happiness or joy into your life, you are more likely to find someone than if you were to indulge yourself in envy over other people’s relationships.
Pursue a life of meaning and be grateful for the journey that you are on.
Experiencing pain ensures that the happiness you are destined for will feel much more amazing and valuable.
With that being said, I hope you found this article on how do I stop envying other people’s relationships to be insightful and a source of comfort. If you’re a guy and you’re interested in finding the girl of your dreams, grab a copy of my eBook that details everything you need to do to attract and keep women in your life.