Let’s assume you’re either fresh out of a breakup or it’s been a short while and you’ve met someone new who you’re interested in rebounding with or you’re in a rebound relationship. But, what’s holding you back is the following question, do rebounds make you miss your ex more.
Rebounds can make you miss your ex more if you still have feelings for your ex, you haven’t spent enough time processing the breakup or if your rebounds do not make you feel properly loved.Â
One of the main reasons why rebounds don’t work out is because of our unintentional or intentional desire to compare.Â
If, during your comparison, you find that your rebound is not as good as or doesn’t not make you feel as good as your ex, this will affect the rebound relationship.
Not only will you start missing your ex more but it will make you question the rebound relationship as a whole.
Related post: Rebound relationships – what is it and what you need to know
Reasons why rebounds make you miss your ex more
Another reason why rebounds make you miss your ex is that you haven’t taken enough time to be single.
Remaining single after a breakup forces you to slowly sever the ties to your past.Â
It is inevitable to be focusing on that which you have lost. You will experience nostalgia and a sense of mourning.
None of those feelings can be avoided.
Rebounds temporarily distract you from those feelings and memories but as soon as the novelty of a rebound relationship wears off, all those feelings for your ex and memories of the relationship will come flooding back in even more intensely.
This is why anyone who has been in a relationship with someone who is rebounding will notice that they start getting sad, distant and confused after a few weeks or a few months of being together.
The rebounder may have been so desperate to escape the trauma of a breakup that they didn’t realize a new relationship would not simply erase the aftermath of parting ways with someone they loved.
What you need to realize is that dating someone new will not replace or erase the relationship you had with someone else.
It can only ease the pain for a while but eventually, you will be forced to deal with the feelings of separation anxiety, sadness, depression, confusion and so forth.
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In fact, what you may find even more surprising is the fact that even a toxic ex is someone you may end up missing.
We all have the tendency of looking at the past through rose-tinted glasses. We naturally gravitate towards the memories that were more positive and deep.Â
I understand how disconcerting this can be but it’s normal if you’re going through something like this.Â
Related post: How to stop missing your ex
Should you be in a rebound relationship if you miss your ex?
Honestly, I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone because in the end, you’ll end up hurting another person whilst also hurting yourself.
If your rebound relationship ends because you started missing your ex, now you’ll have to deal with two breakups back to back and the feelings associated with that.
Don’t put yourself through the guilt and regret of jumping into a rebound relationship when you haven’t dealt with your breakup.
If you’re already in a rebound relationship, the only thing you can and should do is be honest with your new partner.Â
Now, bear in mind, just because you miss your ex right now doesn’t mean that you’ll always feel this way.
Nor does it eliminate the possibility that you may fall deeply in love with your rebound relationship to the point that you’re fully committed and completely in love.
Whether your rebound relationship can survive such an ideal depends on how accommodating your new partner is and whether he or she is willing to exercise infinite patience during this difficult time with you.
Related post: Do relationships that move too fast fail?
What should you do?
The only way to fully move on is to process how you feel and let time work it’s magic. There’s no telling exactly how long it will take but you absolutely need to feel these emotions for your ex in order to move on from it.
This will be a difficult time for you.
To be honest, you only have two options:
- End your rebound relationship or take a break from it.
- Work through it with your rebound.
If you decide to work through your feelings for your ex without ending your rebound relationship, I implore you to find someone to confide in.
You can talk to your partner and share stuff with him or her but it’s not advisable to share information that will hurt them or make them feel uncomfortable.
Be honest with your new partner when you are feeling down and need some time to just be alone with your thoughts and feelings.
As much as possible, don’t blame your new partner if this becomes an issue.
During this time, keep reminding yourself of why your old relationship needed to end and cannot be fixed. This will make it easier for you to move on when you are riddled with doubt when you begin to miss your ex.
I would tell you this – if you try everything and still find yourself wanting to make up with your ex, it might be best to end your rebound relationship.
Your heart is simply not available to anyone else right now and you should allow both you and your new partner to move on.
In conclusion
Rebound relationships can be very difficult to navigate when you are consumed by feelings of longing and desire for your ex.
You have to be patient with yourself and honest with your new partner during this time.
Communication is of utmost importance during this time so I strongly urge you to focus on finding a solution that will be honest and good for the both of you, even if that means parting ways.
With that being said, I hope you found this article on do rebounds make you miss your ex more to be insightful. Feel free to share your thoughts in the comment section below.