Texting can make or break a relationship. Things could start off hot and heavy but suddenly crash by making simple texting mistakes. Yet, it can also facilitate the development of romantic feelings and intimacy. But, the question for today is whether or not girls like texting.
Yes, girls like texting but only to a certain degree. When you text a girl to set dates or to let her know she’s on your mind, it can be endearing and have a positive effect on her level of attraction and interest. However, texting girls too much can lead to rejection and the friendzone.
Moderation is key when it comes to texting and nurturing a relationship.
Honestly, it doesn’t matter whether you’re courting a girl or in a relationship, there’s no excuse for you to be sitting on the phone all day and night texting her.
Take it from a guy who used to do this, it inhibits the amount of excitement you both experience in the relationship.
It can be tempting to text all the time as well. There’s a great deal of comfort and validation that comes from texting each other all day long.
But, in the long run, it prevents the two of you from having really exciting and engaging conversations in person.
The thing is that women love to connect.
They want to feel heard, understood, cared for and loved. This comes from connecting and it’s so easy to connect when you can text.
Also, when you’ve been doing things correctly and pursuing a life of balance, there’ll be times when you aren’t speaking.
Her interest, attraction and desire are going to grow during these moments as well.
So, she’ll text you to find out how you are, whether you’re thinking about her and to feel connected to you.
For these reasons, it’s quite obvious that girls do like texting.
Related post: Why less is more when texting a girl
Tips On How To Text A Girl And Not Get Friendzoned
1. Don’t double text her all the time
Nothing screams desperate or clingy like double or triple texting a girl frequently. You should be able to wait a few hours, at least, to let her get back to you.
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I’m of the opinion that texting is overrated and you’re wasting your time by trying to text a girl into a relationship.
It’s much better to play it cool and let her come to you at her own pace.
And if you feel like she won’t ever reply to you unless you double or triple text her then you need to recognize that this is a sign of low interest and stop chasing her.
More texting isn’t going to change things for the better.
Related post: What to do if a girl doesn’t text you back?
2. Match and mirror her effort
When you approach texting like a game of tennis or volleyball, it’s easy to avoid texting a girl out of your life.
But, when you hit the ball and wait for her to hit it back, you can maintain a standard of texting that is respectful and fair.
She’ll recognize that you aren’t going to chase her and if she has a genuine interest in getting to know you then she has to hit that ball back in a timeous and enthusiastic manner.
If she doesn’t, then you will just match and mirror her behavior.
This will safeguard you from over-investing yourself in girls who are just not into you or respectful of your time and presence.
Related post: How often should you talk to your girlfriend?
3. Do not try to be overly flirtatious
Look, there’s no need to be anything other than yourself.
Sure, there’s nothing wrong with trying to improve your game and become more proficient at flirting online.
But, keep it authentic.
Don’t just try to be some overly flirtatious and smooth talker when you aren’t that.
Girls can smell insincerity and a lack of security from a mile away.
If you’re going to be flirty, keep it realistic and honest.
Don’t be like those insincere guys who start complimenting the shade of a girl’s nails or the zipper on her pants. That’s silly and ridiculous, especially when you’re only doing that to be different.
4. Avoid using sexual innuendos unnecessarily
When it comes to texting sexual innuendos, it’s best to just avoid it at first because you may come across really cheap or it may scare her off because you paint the wrong impression of yourself.
Some girls are also turned off by guys who appear overly sexual and inappropriate.
For this reason, I tend to advise guys to avoid this altogether until they know her well and she knows you well.
5. Be selective about what topics you text about
When getting to know someone, it’s advisable to avoid topics that are provocative, negative and overly controversial.
You need to establish a base of trust, rapport and connection before doing any of that, or else you run the risk of being judged unfairly.
Topics about your ex, past relationships, sexual encounters, insecurities and even politics are best avoided for a while or altogether if you want unless she asks.
6. Ask her more questions
People love to talk about themselves. I’ve read this in the book How To Win Friends And Influence People and I’ve observed it in reality.
The best way to connect with people isn’t to be interesting but to be interested.
When you ask open-ended questions, even in text, it creates an opportunity for people to talk about themselves and feel heard.
They’ll enjoy talking to you and the conversation will flow better than you’d expect.
Final Thoughts
As much as girls do like texting, it doesn’t mean that you should sit on your phone all day long and text her.
Attraction and love are developed in person and in absence.
As a man, your goal is to pursue your purpose in life and to be present for those people in your life who deserve your love and attention.
Balance may sometimes feel unattainable but you should be striving for it.
Make time to text girls but also make time for yourself.
When you are working on something important or trying to develop yourself, it’s okay to spend that time without your phone and being dialed in.
Focus on what you are doing and live in the moment.
If a girl is missing you, let her know that you’re missing her as well and later on, you’re going to take some time to text or call her because you want to know everything that’s on her mind.
This is how you text in a healthy, confident and mature manner.
Trust me, it’s not worth it to live life only on your phone.
Just remember, texting is supplementary in a relationship. It’s the time spent together in person that matters most.
So, make sure that you’re becoming the best possible version of yourself so that when you show up in person, she feels heard and loved.
With that being said, I hope you found this article on whether or not girls like texting to be insightful, practical and thought-provoking. If you would like to share your questions or thoughts with me, please do so by leaving a comment below.