I always warn people to look out for these 3 warning signs of an unhealthy relationship as early as possible to avoid unnecessary heartbreak and pain down the line.
The 3 warning signs are poor communication, lies and deceit and an overcontrolling partner. In my opinion, these are the unholy trinity of relationships.
Let’s take a closer look at these 3 warning signs of an unhealthy relationship so that you have a firm understanding of what to look out for in the future as well as how to take action against this unhealthy behavior.
1. Poor Communication
At the core of any relationship is communication. Attraction and all these other attributes only play a supplementary role in the overall quality and longevity of a relationship.
If you want to have a relationship that can grow and withstand the challenges thrown at it in the years to come, you need good communication with your partner.
What is considered to be good communication?
Firstly, the ability to listen. If you find yourself feeling isolated in the relationship without an ear to listen to your thoughts and feelings, it can detrimentally impact your happiness.
A good communicator is someone who will give you the time of the day. By this, I mean that he or she will listen to what you have to say without judging or dismissing you.
That’s just half the battle won. The other side of communication is the ability to share your thoughts and feelings in an understandable and respectful manner.
What’s the point in having a partner who listens to you only to bark and hurls insults and judgment your way?
You need someone who can maintain respect, acknowledge what you say and share his or her thoughts with you, even if it’s not easy to say or hear.
As a rule of thumb, consider anyone who doesn’t listen and lacks the ability to express themselves in a respectful and caring manner to be a potentially bad communicator.
And if that person tends to judge, insult, swear, belittle or disrespect you with their words, then they are terrible communicators.
Check out this article on whether you should break up with your boyfriend.
2. Lies And Deceit
The second component of a healthy relationship is trust. Without trust between two people, you have nothing.
You can’t build a castle on a shaky foundation. All your work will eventually crumble before your eyes leaving you scathe and damaged.
Make a mental note of whether your new love interest is honest and open about their life.
There is a very thin line between being mysterious and secretive.
If your partner is constantly lying to you and giving you a reason to doubt his or her true intentions, then you are staring at a warning sign of a bad relationship.
A lot of people are honest by nature but you are bound to meet someone who will twist and manipulate the facts, even if it will result in you suffering heartache.
Don’t choose someone who will sacrifice you like a pawn in a game.
I’ve encountered someone who I knew for a long time to be full of lies and deceit.
I resisted and made excuses for all her lies but eventually, I came to the acceptance that I was dealing with someone who was flawed in a way that is detrimental to her own happiness and the happiness of the people around her.
Check out this article on how to get over being cheated on once and for all.
The third warning sign is one that can be tricky to identify because it is often confused for confidence and possessiveness.
I feel like there’s a desire in most of us to feel the warmth of possessiveness because it can fulfill this urge of being truly loved by someone else.
And yet, this very wonderful desire can easily mistake someone who is overcontrolling for someone who is over loving.
A good relationship allows both individuals to grow as a couple and as separate people.
The ability to willingly choose your partner over something or somebody else is valuable.
Someone who forces you to be with them by controlling your every move will drain you of the happiness, love and freedom you need to live life to the fullest.
Someone who is overcontrolling is susceptible to being manipulative, overbearing, abusive in some form or the other and not understanding.
Find someone who is willing to compromise within reason.
Something as simple as asking about what you would like to do is an important quality to find in a good partner.
How To Avoid A Bad Relationship
The best thing you could do is draw up a list of the ideal partner and narrow it down to the top 5 to 10 attributes that matter the most to you.
When you start to meet new people, use that list to determine how many items they tick off.
This will give you a blueprint of how to attract the right kind of person to be with.
Most importantly, don’t ignore these 3 warning signs of an unhealthy relationship.
If someone exhibits one or more of the 3 signs mentioned above, you need to place them on probation.
Allow some time and experience to reveal whether they are relationship material or not.
But, you have to be objective, to some degree, of someone’s character.
Don’t fall into the trap of wanting to fix someone who has potential if they don’t even see the flaws in their own character.
You would be heading for an uphill battle that ends badly for both parties.
When you start to notice bad habits forming in a relationship, nip it in the bud early on.
Have a conversation with your partner suggesting ways you both can improve as lovers.
Don’t Settle For Bad
If you think being alone is bad, trust me when I say that it pales in comparison to being with a bad person in a bad relationship.
Don’t settle for a toxic relationship. Someone better is definitely out there for you.
Be respectful to yourself and wait for someone who is more deserving of you. Check out this list of traits to look for in a guy.
I really hope you found this article to be helpful. If you need any advice, feel free to reach out.
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